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Saturday, October 24, 2015

Trying to be Good

Micah made a journal cover out of painted cardboard and has begun going through my quote books copying down ones he likes.  His favorite book to copy from is my "Quotable Lewis."  I had to take a couple of pictures of this because trying to describe how incredibly adorable this is in words alone doesn't work.  I love how he uses his little foot to hold open the book.  He says he wants to make a habit of writing down favorite quotes.  When he first showed me his journal cover and the new practice he had begun, I couldn't stop smiling.  This kind of thing makes me so proud!  I immediately thought of the verse in 3 John 1:4

"I have no greater joy than to hear that my children walk in truth."

One quote that Micah excitedly showed me a few nights ago was this; “No man knows how bad he is till he has tried very hard to be good." - C.S. Lewis  This quote has been repeating over in my mind for the past couple of days.  Boy, do I feel it in my own life!  It's humbling because I am trying so very hard to be good and the more I try the more I see another area that needs changing or improvement.  It's like the completely remodeled house C.S. Lewis talks about:

“Imagine yourself as a living house. God comes in to rebuild that house. At first, perhaps, you can understand what He is doing. He is getting the drains right and stopping the leaks in the roof and so on; you knew that those jobs needed doing and so you are not surprised. But presently He starts knocking the house about in a way that hurts abominably and does not seem to make any sense. What on earth is He up to? The explanation is that He is building quite a different house from the one you thought of - throwing out a new wing here, putting on an extra floor there, running up towers, making courtyards. You thought you were being made into a decent little cottage: 
But He is building a palace. He intends to come and live in it Himself.”
- C.S. Lewis

Sometimes trying to turn my whole entire heart over to the Lord is painful and I can testify that there are times it really "hurts abominably" but I know that "He is building quite a different house" from the one I ever imagined.  I'm not discouraged because of the change within me that must occur because I know it's for my good and I can feel the patient love of my Savior through the Atonement.  It's a beautiful thing!


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