This Past Week

This past week was kind of a crazy and unexpected one. 

Another foster mom had contacted me through Facebook asking if I could provide respite care for her. She needed me to watch her 8-yr-old foster son just for a couple of days so she could have a little break. I told her I'd be more than happy to help her out.

The morning arrived for her to drop him off. She came in our house alone to talk with us first before she brought her foster son inside to meet us. Her voice was shaky and she seemed terribly distressed. "Sorry, I'm earlier than I said I'd be here," she said wringing her hands nervously. "We had an incident this morning that was really hard for all of us." 

We assured her that she was just fine. She paused and then proceeded to explain her distress.

Tears welled up in her eyes as she tried to choke back the tears. This was her first placement and she had only had him for three months. At my invitation, she took a deep breath and then seemed to pour out every frustration and fear that had built up inside her over the last few months.

"I can't do this anymore!" She cried. "I just can't do this."

I hugged her and told her not to beat herself up over it, "It's okay. Foster care is very difficult. Please don't think you've failed. It's okay if you can't do it anymore." She seemed grateful for my empathy and relieved that I didn't judge her. I knew the burden she carried. 

The phone rang about an hour or two after she left. The foster boy's social worker was on the line, "Hi Alicia, we understand that you have so-and-so's foster son staying with you. She (his foster mom) just called us to let us know she is quitting foster care." 

"Wow, that was quick! I guess I'm not surprised though. She was pretty worn down when she dropped him off with us. I could tell she wouldn't last long. I felt pretty bad for her." 

The social worker sighed, "This whole situation is very sad. We didn't realize it was this rough for her. I know you were only planning on doing respite care with this boy but now we need you to keep him longer until we can find a permanent family closer to his location." I told them we'd be happy to care for him as they worked things out.

Both of his parents  passed away  a year ago from drug overdoses. He's a sweet little kid with a TON of energy! He became attached to me and seemed to want my attention every second. (Which was a bit of an adjustment especially for my little foster daughter. She is usually the one who soaks up all my time.) All of our 4 bio kids of course handle these huge changes in amazing ways and I am constantly grateful for their strength of character. What a blessing! 

I got a phone call from the social worker a couple days ago that they already found a wonderful couple for him who hope to adopt. They are just a little older than me and Joseph. They have never been able to have children but they have two dogs and love the outdoors. He is very active and will love having the outdoor activities and the dogs!  I met his new family over the phone a couple days ago and took him to his new home last night. I feel really good about them!  

The great news is that they only live about thirteen blocks away from us so, just a short little drive and he could come and visit anytime.  I ordered him a birthday present from Amazon yesterday and plan to take it to him on his birthday next week. He's very glad he can keep in touch.  

Showing off the pipe-cleaner jewelry my foster son made me.