I can't believe it's the end of May! Joseph and I were just talking this morning about how it seems time is passing freakishly fast. We're entering Chandler's senior year of high school, Miriam will be a sophomore, Micah is now thirteen, Kaylee will be ten in a few weeks, and Millie will officially be our little girl in five days.
Speaking of the adoption, I still can't believe that things went through with our case this fast! June 4th is the first court day our adoption attorney set for us. He guarantees that we will win the case and we'll have our adoption certificate in our hands by that evening. We will be sealed to Amillia the following evening in the Provo City Center Temple. The brother who is sealing her to us is our Stake Patriarch (Patriarch Snow) and also the husband to my counselor in the Relief Society (Margene). They adopted their two youngest daughters.
We are very happy to adopt this sweet little girl. She definitely fits very well into our family! There are moments I get a little fearful: those moments she displays certain difficult behaviors that are very common among children from hard places, from trauma, common among children who have been removed from their families. It's hard to explain to anyone who is not in the trenches. I mean, let's face it, the way the rest of the world views adoption is totally romanticized. It is hard!!
Currently, I am involved with three hours of training and therapy per week revolving around Millie. Which on some weeks, it equals out to five. I take Kaylee with me whenever I can so she doesn't feel left out. She's a little more sensitive to me being gone. I am learning that I need to rewire my own brain and seriously confront the abuse and trauma from my own childhood. It's hard but it's very very good.
We're moving on... continuing into the unknown. I feel very blessed despite the difficulties though. I have an amazing family! I couldn't be more proud!
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The Purest Love
"The gospel of Jesus Christ is a gospel of transformation. It takes us as men and women of the earth and refines us into men and wom...
Wednesday, May 30, 2018
Wednesday, May 23, 2018
"How to Grow Love" & "Now and Most"
We recently had Stake Conference. The Saturday talks centered on the new ministering program ministering.lds.org
My favorite talk was by Elder Cornish of the Seventy, who spoke about the cycle of love and serving others, the way it grows more love in our hearts. He shared the scripture 1 John 4:19, "We love God because He first loved us." He asked how anyone could ever love another when that other has done nothing for the one who loves them.
Elder Cornish has delivered hundreds of babies throughout his career and he gave the example of a mother's love to answer his own question. "What did that baby ever do for the mother those nine months in the womb or those first couple years of life? She loves because of the time and sacrifice she has given in total selfless service to her baby."
Elder Cornish then testified that if we have faith in God's infinite and perfect love for us and allow it to work within our hearts so we can really feel who we are to Him, let it change us, fill us with hope. And then, try and share that love with others through charitable acts and service, showing them what God's love feels like - our love will grow in two ways; Our love for those we serve and the ability to feel God's love for ourselves.
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The Sunday talks were mostly centered around the 4th commandment -honoring the Sabbath Day and keeping it holy. I have a strong testimony of the blessings that come from treating the Sabbath with reverence and using it to honor the sacrifice of our Savior and be about His ministry.
Again, the talk that really stood out to me was Elder Cornish's. He spoke about "now" and "most". He said that too often we sacrifice things we want most for what we want now, which always leads to bondage and misery.
He said happiness and blessings from God come the other way around as we learn to sacrifice what we want now for what we want most. It seems pretty simple when it's written out like this but it's not always easy to put into practice. What we want now usually has more to do with our physical appetites but what we want most usually has more to do with the eternal and spiritual matters. It takes practicing meekness, humility, and living the first commandment -having no other God's before our Father in Heaven.
Elder Cornish pointed out that one of the most common false God's worshiped in today's world is the god of "self" selfishness or self-centeredness. He said that the biggest obstacle in our way of honoring the 4th commandment (keeping the Sabbath day) is often our breaking of the 1st (worshiping other gods).
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It was a wonderful Stake Conference!! Of course, there was so much more shared than I have here but these were the parts that really stuck with me... and I just wanted to write them down somewhere so I wouldn't forget. :)
My favorite talk was by Elder Cornish of the Seventy, who spoke about the cycle of love and serving others, the way it grows more love in our hearts. He shared the scripture 1 John 4:19, "We love God because He first loved us." He asked how anyone could ever love another when that other has done nothing for the one who loves them.
Elder Cornish has delivered hundreds of babies throughout his career and he gave the example of a mother's love to answer his own question. "What did that baby ever do for the mother those nine months in the womb or those first couple years of life? She loves because of the time and sacrifice she has given in total selfless service to her baby."
Elder Cornish then testified that if we have faith in God's infinite and perfect love for us and allow it to work within our hearts so we can really feel who we are to Him, let it change us, fill us with hope. And then, try and share that love with others through charitable acts and service, showing them what God's love feels like - our love will grow in two ways; Our love for those we serve and the ability to feel God's love for ourselves.
-------
The Sunday talks were mostly centered around the 4th commandment -honoring the Sabbath Day and keeping it holy. I have a strong testimony of the blessings that come from treating the Sabbath with reverence and using it to honor the sacrifice of our Savior and be about His ministry.
Again, the talk that really stood out to me was Elder Cornish's. He spoke about "now" and "most". He said that too often we sacrifice things we want most for what we want now, which always leads to bondage and misery.
He said happiness and blessings from God come the other way around as we learn to sacrifice what we want now for what we want most. It seems pretty simple when it's written out like this but it's not always easy to put into practice. What we want now usually has more to do with our physical appetites but what we want most usually has more to do with the eternal and spiritual matters. It takes practicing meekness, humility, and living the first commandment -having no other God's before our Father in Heaven.
Elder Cornish pointed out that one of the most common false God's worshiped in today's world is the god of "self" selfishness or self-centeredness. He said that the biggest obstacle in our way of honoring the 4th commandment (keeping the Sabbath day) is often our breaking of the 1st (worshiping other gods).
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It was a wonderful Stake Conference!! Of course, there was so much more shared than I have here but these were the parts that really stuck with me... and I just wanted to write them down somewhere so I wouldn't forget. :)
Tuesday, May 15, 2018
Another One Bites the Dust
Perhaps the hardest death to watch is the death of one's faith, to see the light in their eyes and the love of the Gospel go out.
My husband met him in 2008, they were both studying physics and astronomy. They started studying together to help each other out with homework and exams, instantly becoming great friends. It was a big deal because Joseph doesn't usually have close friendships with anyone, well he hadn't up until Ryan. Joseph is a family guy, he keeps his relationships strong with his siblings and doesn't usually venture out from there because he's a little shy and a little introverted.
My husband met him in 2008, they were both studying physics and astronomy. They started studying together to help each other out with homework and exams, instantly becoming great friends. It was a big deal because Joseph doesn't usually have close friendships with anyone, well he hadn't up until Ryan. Joseph is a family guy, he keeps his relationships strong with his siblings and doesn't usually venture out from there because he's a little shy and a little introverted.
But somehow Ryan was like a brother to Joseph. Many late-night studying sessions on campus would often end in wonderful and enlightening spiritual discussions. I remember Joseph often coming home around 11pm, crawling into bed, and telling me all about school and his friend.
I was so glad Joseph had someone there on campus to make the hours fly by a little more easily. I'd take the children up to the science building a couple times a week so they could visit dad. It was often the only time they got to see him besides Sunday. They'd giggle with excitement all the way down the hall as they approached the office Joseph did his studies in. Ryan was always there with Joseph and the kids began to call him, "Uncle Ryan".
They did a science presentation in Puerto Rico together. He came to Joseph's graduation and Joseph went to his. Our whole family went to Ryan's wedding ceremony at the Timpanogos Temple and Joseph stood in the circle for their first child's baby blessing. Ryan came to almost all our kid's baptisms too.
He moved away a couple years ago and changed his major to psychology. Ryan and Joseph were like brothers so they maintained close contact across the miles through email several times a week. I don't know exactly when the shift happened but Joseph started noticing a change of tone in Ryan's messages. When Joseph would share a quote from a recent conference address or from the scriptures, instead of being affirmed through Ryan's testimony, the responses were less supportive, debating the validity of Joseph's spiritual thoughts because they weren't from more "enlightened philosophers".
His criticism of the prophets increased and his church attendance decreased. Their emails to each other slowed to about once a month. After about a year of this decline, Ryan finally told Joseph all together, that he and his wife had left the Church, to explore a new freedom, new thoughts, and new ideas among the swells of moral relativism. At the end of this last message to Joseph a couple weeks ago, he said, "thanks for not trying to save me" as if Ryan wanted to make absolutely certain that Joseph understood he doesn't want him to ever try to save him.
It's been hard to watch Joseph go through this. Even though Joseph is not an emotional guy and does a pretty good job keeping his true feelings beneath the surface, I can tell he has been experiencing a very real loss. This has been horribly painful for him. To lose a friend spiritually feels more grievous than lossing one to physically to natural causes.
I've been very proud of Joseph though and have been impressed with his stamina. He has held strong to a pattern of regular, daily morning prayer and thorough scripture study. He spends at least a half-an-hour or more every single day studying the gospel through living and ancient prophets, he journals extensively too, and could publish volumes upon volumes alone of his scripture study thoughts. He's a great example to me. I know this habit has kept Joseph from being swept away by his friend and has kept Joseph anchored to "the good ship Zion". I thank God that Joseph has remained true to his covenants in the middle of this storm.
I am also proud of Joseph for continuing to be kind to Ryan. He has left the invitation open to still be there for his friend. Who knows if he'll ever return?
-Alicia
P.S.
Here's some great articles about the dangers of Moral Relativism.
https://www.lds.org/search?lang=eng&query=%22moral+relativism%22
"We live in a day when the age-old standards of morality, marriage, home, and family suffer defeat after defeat in courts and councils, in parliaments and classrooms. Our happiness depends upon living those very standards....... Paul told young Timothy to continue in the things he had learned from the Apostles and said he would be safe because 'from a child thou hast known the holy scriptures, which are able to make thee wise unto salvation through faith which is in Christ Jesus' (2 Tim. 3:15)"
I was so glad Joseph had someone there on campus to make the hours fly by a little more easily. I'd take the children up to the science building a couple times a week so they could visit dad. It was often the only time they got to see him besides Sunday. They'd giggle with excitement all the way down the hall as they approached the office Joseph did his studies in. Ryan was always there with Joseph and the kids began to call him, "Uncle Ryan".
They did a science presentation in Puerto Rico together. He came to Joseph's graduation and Joseph went to his. Our whole family went to Ryan's wedding ceremony at the Timpanogos Temple and Joseph stood in the circle for their first child's baby blessing. Ryan came to almost all our kid's baptisms too.
He moved away a couple years ago and changed his major to psychology. Ryan and Joseph were like brothers so they maintained close contact across the miles through email several times a week. I don't know exactly when the shift happened but Joseph started noticing a change of tone in Ryan's messages. When Joseph would share a quote from a recent conference address or from the scriptures, instead of being affirmed through Ryan's testimony, the responses were less supportive, debating the validity of Joseph's spiritual thoughts because they weren't from more "enlightened philosophers".
His criticism of the prophets increased and his church attendance decreased. Their emails to each other slowed to about once a month. After about a year of this decline, Ryan finally told Joseph all together, that he and his wife had left the Church, to explore a new freedom, new thoughts, and new ideas among the swells of moral relativism. At the end of this last message to Joseph a couple weeks ago, he said, "thanks for not trying to save me" as if Ryan wanted to make absolutely certain that Joseph understood he doesn't want him to ever try to save him.
It's been hard to watch Joseph go through this. Even though Joseph is not an emotional guy and does a pretty good job keeping his true feelings beneath the surface, I can tell he has been experiencing a very real loss. This has been horribly painful for him. To lose a friend spiritually feels more grievous than lossing one to physically to natural causes.
I've been very proud of Joseph though and have been impressed with his stamina. He has held strong to a pattern of regular, daily morning prayer and thorough scripture study. He spends at least a half-an-hour or more every single day studying the gospel through living and ancient prophets, he journals extensively too, and could publish volumes upon volumes alone of his scripture study thoughts. He's a great example to me. I know this habit has kept Joseph from being swept away by his friend and has kept Joseph anchored to "the good ship Zion". I thank God that Joseph has remained true to his covenants in the middle of this storm.
I am also proud of Joseph for continuing to be kind to Ryan. He has left the invitation open to still be there for his friend. Who knows if he'll ever return?
-Alicia
P.S.
Here's some great articles about the dangers of Moral Relativism.
https://www.lds.org/search?lang=eng&query=%22moral+relativism%22
"We live in a day when the age-old standards of morality, marriage, home, and family suffer defeat after defeat in courts and councils, in parliaments and classrooms. Our happiness depends upon living those very standards....... Paul told young Timothy to continue in the things he had learned from the Apostles and said he would be safe because 'from a child thou hast known the holy scriptures, which are able to make thee wise unto salvation through faith which is in Christ Jesus' (2 Tim. 3:15)"
- Boyd K. Packer
Sunday, May 13, 2018
First Mother's Day Without Mom
Saturday, May 5, 2018
Grafted Into Our Family Tree
We filled out paper work last month to petition for adoption with our little foster girl and didn't hear anything from our attorney for a few weeks. Finally, he called us last week asking if we would be available to be in court on the first Monday of June.
Joseph and I checked our schedules and told him it would be fine. We asked our attorney several questions since we have never met or been to court with him before and didn't know what to expect.
We just assumed this date he was setting for us would be a "first of many" court dates.... that's why we were so surprised when he told us that it is the official adoption day they've set for us and encouraged us to invite all our family and friends. Wow! We didn't know it would happen this quick after our petition. From other cases we hear about in foster care, we assumed our case would also require several court dates.
We didn't expect to have our first court date with our attorney be our only court date but we're very pleased that our case will be so easy. The Temple is closed the day of her adoption so, our sealing date is set for the day after.
We are looking forward to participating in a family sealing and the experience it will provide for our bio children. They love her so much! We are very excited! This little girl fits so well in our family! 💓
-Alicia
We are looking forward to participating in a family sealing and the experience it will provide for our bio children. They love her so much! We are very excited! This little girl fits so well in our family! 💓
-Alicia
Wednesday, May 2, 2018
April 2018
Easter Weekend 2018
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| Amy, Dad, me, Millie at The Wentworth, to participate in the Easter Egg Hunt Amy planned with her residents. |
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| Amy and her two beautiful kids. |
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| Four of my five beautiful kids at Amy's work for her Easter party. |
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| Dying Easter eggs with Elise and Lucy |
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| Traditional Easter Baskets made from milk jugs - started by my mom when I was growing up. |
Easter Sunday 2018
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| Easter morning looking for the baskets. |
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| The kids played an egg smashing game that was supposed to be these rubber eggs filled randomly with water. Since it was April 1st. I took real egg and poured it into a couple of the toy eggs. Miriam and Micah laughed about that trick but I still don't think Kaylee has forgiven me. I thought it was absolutely hilarious! |
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| Jeannie, Dad, and Alexa on Easter Sunday with our traditional golden eggs hung from a tree (left background) Within the eggs, tell the story of the life and sacrifice of Jesus Christ. I think mom is the first one who showed me the story like this. (My dad's sister, Jeannie, now lives with him since my mom passed away. I'm so glad my dad has her there so he isn't quite so lonely.) |
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| Kaylee took notes during General Conference. Her favorite talk, by Elder Lynn Robbins, was all about how everyone makes mistakes and to keep going and not get discouraged. |
Spending Time Together
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| Joseph and I are trying to go hiking once a week for our date night. It doesn't cost a dime and we have a great time together! |
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| Really cool looking tree from our hike. |
Micah and His Creations
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| Joseph and I were at an Adoption's training class all day and when we got home, we discovered Micah entertaining our two younger girls with his Brain-O-Tron. (Nice side profile.) |
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| Brain-O-Tron Mugshot |
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| Micah made this little leprechaun trap out of craft scraps for St. Patrick's Day. Later, he made it even more cool by painting it green with sprinkles of gold glitter. |
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| Medieval gloves, sword, and helmet entirely out of cardboard and silver duct tape. The gloves and shoulder pads he also covered with silver tape after Joseph took this picture. |
Nice Days Outside
| Happy I LOVE YOU day |
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| I just wanted to randomly surprise Joseph with a cute little date night. I got Micah and Kaylee on board to help me. They were our adorable little servers for "The Attic" restaurant above our garage. (As you can see, it's pretty high class. ;) ) Micah made the menu and Kaylee drew a big heart on the white board for us. We had soft romantic music playing and we danced after the dinner was over. |
Miriam Turns 15!!
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| Alexa photo bombing :) |
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| Awesome, beautiful, and fun Miriam! We love you!!! |
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| Kaylee having fun with her two grandpas on Miriam's birthday. |
Family Night
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