Reminds Me of Mom

With Valentine's around the corner, I can't help but think of my mom. She loved Valentines Day and found so much fun in making the whole week leading up to it an excuse to share little gifts and thoughtful notes of love for each of us kids.

February 14th last year was a bitter-sweet one for me because it's the last time I was with my mom before her accident. It was the last time she hugged me. I took the kids with me to my sister, Amy's work at the Wentworth Retirement Center to bring my sister flowers and decorate her desk with hearts. Amy is a Recreational Therapist and always plans fun things for the residents.

I spent most of my time that day focused on helping my sister with her activities and the residents. I hardly spoke with my mom because I was running around so much. I feel bad about that. Mom gave me a hug after the program was over and thanked me for visiting Amy - I know that meant the most to her. She said she wished she could stay longer but she had a cold she was battling and wanted to go home to get some rest.

Little did I know that the medicine my mom's doctor would prescribe to her for her cold a couple weeks later would be the cause of her heart arrhythmia and cardiac arrest.


I miss my mom. Sometimes, I'll dream of seeing her again, I'll run to her and hug her so tight.

It's strange how different moments shape your memory and the things you associate with them. This photograph from Feb. 14th last year of my mom watching my sister's program is the first image that plays over in my mind now whenever I think of Valentine's. I see her dressed up pretty in her black blouse and white scarf, her long grey streaked hair, and black pearl earrings to match.

 I see this image in my mind just at the mention of Valentine's and my heart aches. I want to stop what I'm doing, sit next to my mom, and throw my arms around her - just enjoy the moment I have to be with her.