"I pray the power of the Holy Ghost will be with each of us—that we may think what we need to think, feel what we need to feel, and learn what we need to learn so we can do what we know we should do and ultimately become what the Lord yearns for us to become." - David A. Bednar
It's part of my routine now to take my foster children to visit their parents every Tuesday evening for two hours. Sometimes I stay and watch but sometimes it's too hard for me to stay. I learn so much about the children's behavior, the root of their desires, and the habits that seem to be ingrained in them.
Sometimes, I leave these visits feeling very angry and frustrated, wanting to knock some sense into the parents and show them just how much damage they have done. I want to force them to break the vicious cycle they've been in all their lives, somehow just make them stop. I have to remind myself to be forgiving and pray for their parents rather than become resentful.
A couple Tuesdays ago, my foster daughter left the visit with a gift from her mom: a little tiny coin purse on a chain that said, "Thou Shalt Sin". Mom knew that I wouldn't like the text - so as we were leaving, I was grateful when she said that it was up to me if I decided to let her daughter keep it. Of course, my foster daughter didn't want to give up her new gift, no way! So I let her keep it under the condition that she would let me "fix it" first. Her three-year-old mind didn't see the purse as broken but she willingly put it into my hands anyway.
I examined the purse and contemplated how I was going to "fix it". I saw it as an opportunity to teach a subtle lesson. I thought maybe I could insert a "not" between the "shalt sin" part but decided it seemed to be lacking core principle. Maybe I could just paint over the whole thing. I pondered on the commandments God gives us and why He gives them... and then I knew exactly what to do.
The next morning, I showed my foster daughter what I had done to the purse and she beamed with delight. She liked it so much better! (Since she can't read - I'm guessing it was mostly because of the pink letters.)
Even still, this experience is so telling. There are so many layers to it. I've reflected on the transition of thought that comes with three simple words:
"Thou Shalt Sin" - Making a mock of the commandments of God, viewing sin as real freedom, a message to flaunt, to celebrate rebelliousness.
changed to
"Thou Shalt Love" - An understanding of what God's laws really free us to DO and to feel. The foundation and core of Who God IS and what He wants us to ultimately BECOME.
I'm glad my foster daughter likes her purse better this way.
We had some great talks in Sacrament Meeting today. I wrote down all the verses, poems, and quotes that were shared by each speaker. My daughter is sick this Sunday... so after the meeting I stopped by home to check on her. I had a moment to grab her some soup, help her get comfortable, and then post the notes I took before heading out again to give a lesson in Young Women's. :)
- Alicia
Happy Sabbath!
1st Speaker -
“To love another person is to see the face of God.”
― Victor Hugo, Les Misérables
"The scriptures are laid before thee, yea, and all things denote there is a God; yea, even the earth, and all things that are upon the face of it, yea, and its motion, yea, and also all the planets which move in their regular form do witness that there is a Supreme Creator." - Alma 30:44
"For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life." - John 3:16
"If ye love me, keep my commandments." - John 14:15
2nd Speaker -
Under the stars we realize how small we are... and yet we are everything to Him.
“I know not by what method rare
But this I know, God answers prayer.
I know that he has given his Word
Which tells me prayer is always heard
And will be answered soon or late
And so I pray and calmly wait.
I know not if the blessing sought
Will come in just the way I thought
But leave my prayers with him alone
Whose will is wiser than my own
Assured that he will grant my quest
Or send some answer far more blessed.”
― Eliza M. Hickok (Read by, President Monson)
"O how great the goodness of our God, who prepareth a way for our escape from the grasp of this awful monster; yea, that monster, death and hell, which I call the death of the body, and also the death of the spirit." - 2 Nephi 9:10
"There is a simple cure for the terrible malady of forgetting God, His blessings, and His messages to us. Jesus Christ promised it to His disciples when He was about to be crucified, resurrected, and then taken away from them to ascend in glory to His Father. They were concerned to know how they would be able to endure when He was no longer with them. Here is the promise. It was fulfilled for them then. It can be fulfilled for all of us now: 'These things have I spoken unto you, being yet present with you. But the Comforter, which is the Holy Ghost, whom the Father will send in my name, he shall teach you all things, and bring all things to your remembrance, whatsoever I have said unto you.' ( John 14:25–26)" - Elder Henry B. Eyring
"These things have I spoken unto you, being yet present with you. But the Comforter, which is the Holy Ghost, whom the Father will send in my name, he shall teach you all things, and bring all things to your remembrance, whatsoever I have said unto you." - John 15:9-13
(The brother who spoke quoted this portion of Elder Holland's talk)
"O to grace how great a debtor daily I'm constrained to be!
Let thy goodness like a fetter, bind my wandering heart to thee
Prone to wander Lord I feel it, prone to leave the God I love
Here's my heart, O take and seal it, seal it for thy courts aboveO to grace how great a debtor daily I'm constrained to be!
Let thy goodness like a fetter, bind my wandering heart to thee
Prone to wander Lord I feel it, prone to leave the God I love
Here's my heart, O take and seal it, seal it for thy courts above"
3rd Speaker -
"We love him, because he first loved us." -1 John 4:19
" I remember that thou hast said that thou hast loved the world, even unto the laying down of thy life for the world, that thou mightest take it again to prepare a place for the children of men. And now I know that this love which thou hast had for the children of men is charity; wherefore, except men shall have charity they cannot inherit that place which thou hast prepared in the mansions of thy Father." - Ether 12:33-34
"Whosoever believeth that Jesus is the Christ is born of God: and every one that loveth him that begat loveth him also that is begotten of him. By this we know that we love the children of God, when we love God, and keep his commandments. For this is the love of God" - 1 John 5:1-3
(She shared three thoughts from this verse)
1. First we must seek to love God
2. We seek to love everyone around us with this purest love.
3. We show our love by keeping His commandments.
4th Speaker -
How do we feel God's love? We must first believe!
The first principle of the Gospel is faith.
" I feel my Savior's love
In all the world around me.
His Spirit warms my soul
Through ev'rything I see.
I feel my Savior's love;
Its gentleness enfolds me,
And when I kneel to pray,
My heart is filled with peace.
I feel my Savior's love
And know that he will bless me.
I offer him my heart;
My shepherd he will be.
I'll share my Savior's love
By serving others freely.
In serving I am blessed.
In giving I receive.
He knows I will follow him,
Give all my life to him.
I feel my Savior's love,
The love he freely gives me."
- Children's songbook pg. 74
My father and I had the experience of "sharing the Savior's love" to a woman from my ward. We were her hometeachers. She was a widow with four children. When her kids grew older, her first daughter passed away. She lived in a humble house with no heating. We would chop wood for her and visit with her. It was a wonderful experience helping this sweet woman and we felt our Savior's love for her as we served her.
"Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends." - John 15:13
"I stand all amazed at the love Jesus offers me, Confused at the grace that so fully he proffers me....Oh, it is wonderful that he should care for me Enough to die for me! Oh, it is wonderful, wonderful to me!" - Hymn 193
"I’m confident that there is no choice, sin, or mistake that you or anyone else can make that will change [Our Father in Heaven's] love for you or for them. That does not mean He excuses or condones sinful conduct—I’m sure He does not—but it does mean we are to reach out to our fellowman in love..." - Elder Ronald A. Rasband
Around ten years ago, I bought this DVD Standards Night Live by John Bytheway. Chandler took to it right away and has probably watched it more than 30 times since then. It has been very well played in our home. I give it four stars and two enthusiastic thumbs up!
I'd encourage any parent to take advantage of "screen time" like this for their kids. Start them on this stuff as young as you can. In our family, every Christmas and Easter these types of DVDs and EFY talks have become a well anticipated favorite gift our children receive.
In his devotional, Brother Bytheway recites a poem as he expresses the need for God's standards, for God's commandments and relates them to guard rails or fences. I love the imagery and feel like it is very effective when we use it in our efforts to teach our children the "why" in this wonderful Gospel:
The Fence or the Ambulance
By Joseph Malins
‘Twas a dangerous cliff, as they freely confessed,
Though to walk near its crest was so pleasant;
But over its terrible edge there had slipped
A duke, and full many a peasant;
So the people said something would have to be done,
But their projects did not all tally.
Some said, “Put a fence around the edge of the cliff;”
Some, “An ambulance down in the valley.”
But the cry for the ambulance carried the day,
For it spread through the neighboring city,
A fence may be useful or not, it is true,
But each heart became brimful of pity
For those who slipped over that dangerous cliff;
And the dwellers in highway and alley
Gave pounds or gave pence, not to put up a fence,
But an ambulance down in the valley. "For the cliff is all right, if your careful," they said, "And, if folks even slip and are dropping, It isn't the slipping that hurts them so much As the shock down below when they're stopping." So day after day,as these mishaps occurred, Quick forth would those rescuers sally To pick up the victims who fell off the cliff, With their ambulance down in the valley.
Then an old sage remarked, “It’s a marvel to me
That people give far more attention
To repairing the results than to stopping the cause,
When they’d much better aim at prevention.
Let us stop at its source all this mischief,” cried he.
“Come, neighbors and friends let us rally:
If the cliff we will fence we might almost dispense
With the ambulance down in the valley.”
Better guide well the young than reclaim them when old,
For the voice of true wisdom is calling:
“To rescue the fallen is good, but ‘tis best
To prevent other people from falling.”
Better close up the source of temptation and crime
Than to deliver from dungeon or galley;
Better put a strong fence ‘round the top of the cliff,
Than an ambulance down in then valley.
"We can choose to see commandments as limitations. We may feel at times that God’s laws restrict our personal freedom, take from us our agency, and limit our growth. But as we seek for greater understanding, as we allow our Father to teach us, we will begin to see that His laws are a manifestation of His love for us and obedience to His laws is an expression of our love for Him." - Sister Carol M. Stephens - Oct. 2015 General Conference
My heart feels very heavy today for those who view "the fence" or God's laws as restrictive to our personal freedom. I wish there was a way I could convey the liberty and incredible love that accompanies those who give heed to our Father in Heaven. I wish I could express how freeing life can be for those who seek His word and consistently follow His ordained servants.
