The Same Window With a New View

This weekend, we will complete our foster care training.  I spent nearly every day and every hour this past week organizing the bedrooms & closets, throwing out what can be thrown out, and simplifying how many toys the children really need... just doing everything possible to make space for one more boy and one more girl in our home.  Joseph has already ordered the beds.  (We are hoping for a set of siblings.) We've figured out a system of storage where both the girl and boy rooms can each fit three beds, three dressers, their laundry baskets and still feel comfortable.

Friday, I was putting together the second dresser while listening to my "Musical's Playlist" on Spotify.  A song from Annie came on... "It's a Hard-Knock Life"  played loudly and my feet tapped along. I found myself singing the words...  This time though, I paid closer attention to the lyrics as I hammered and drilled away.  Then, I heard something in the 2014 version that was different than other versions... it went like this,  

"No one cares for you a bit,
When you're a foster kid."  

Tears welled up in my eyes.  I've never teared up listening to that song before...ever!  

(I know,  I know.  What doesn't make me cry? Right?) 

Even I was surprised to be getting emotional.
Then "Carrying the Banner" came on from Newsies.  You know the part where the Nuns sing, 

"Blessed children
Though you wander lost and depraved
Jesus loves you,
You shall be safe"  

Awe man!  Strike two!

I think with everything I've been learning, with all the training lectures, just thinking of everything these kids go through, just thinking of the book about trauma I'm half-way finished with... it all just becomes much more real to me.  I will never hear these songs about orphans quite the same again. 

We honestly don't know how many placements we will go through until we receive the ones available for adoption.  We don't know how soon the placements will even happen.  That's really up to the committee.   

When we were given the address of where we would be coordinating all our placements and where the children would be coming from, I was shocked.  How many children have looked out that 5th floor and stared right at our apartment?  We see this building a million times a day.  Little did we realize just how close to home it would be and how much it would play a part in our life.   I pray for these children with all my heart.  We hope they will find some comfort here. And for two of them, we hope our place will become their home to stay.

-Alicia