Save the Children

Ellen and Me - Oceanside, CA

She was born just two weeks after I was.  We both stayed in Utah Valley Regional's newborn facility.  I was premature so I was there a full month but she was there for only a couple of days.  Did our parents pass each other in the hall and give a friendly wave?  Did the same nurse check in on us?  If so, our paths wouldn't cross again until twenty-one years later.

The first time I met Ellen, she was on leave from the Marines to visit her family for the summer.  She joined the Marines just after her brother, Jason.  It was hard for me to believe the stories of her beating all the men from her unit in arm-wrestling contests.  She was an inch or so shorter than me with a nice slender figure.  It was obvious she was toned and fit but she just didn't seem the type.  She was a perfect ginger with shoulder length red hair, a porcelain complexion, ruby red lips, hazel green eyes, and a splash of golden freckles.  I couldn't imagine her being that tough... but the stories were true.  There was a presence about Ellen, a quiet sort of wisdom.  She seemed like she was ten years older than me even though we were almost the exact same age.  I couldn't put my finger on why I felt that way.  I remember being impressed with how much she adored her brother's humor. "Oh stop, Joseph," she laughed, as my soon-to-be husband jokingly posed for her camera in a lurpy stance.

What was it about Ellen that made me feel like she had experiences beyond her age?  Joseph and I must have been married close to three years when I think I discovered the reason:

"She has a daughter? I never knew your sister had a daughter?"
"Yeah, Ellen got pregnant just before I left on my mission." My husband said. "She was sixteen at the time.  I don't remember ever meeting her boyfriend, he took off pretty fast when he got the news and was never heard of again."

A part of her wanted to keep the baby and find a way to struggle through everything all on her own but she knew she wasn't ready for such a lonely undertaking.  The day she gave birth and signed the relinquish papers was the hardest day of her life.  She held her tiny baby girl in her arms, kissed her perfect bronze skin, and caressed her soft black hair.  Tears flowed down her cheeks in an endless stream as she gazed into her little girl's big dark eyes.  She wished she could stop the clock from turning and hold this moment forever.  Finally, it was time;  The nurse walked in, wrapped up Ellen's baby and took her away to her new family.  The hole that remained in Ellen's heart refused to be filled. Joining the Marines was a good excuse for her to get away from all of the surroundings that haunted her and fix her mind on other things.  She had to learn to be tough.

Cruel consequences forced her to grow up much faster than most girls her age.  Her choices launched her into a foreign world.  Such a rude awakening is enough to bring one crashing to their knees.  A strange sort of tender mercy in the form of heartbreak caused her to make serious pivotal changes and she began from that point to turn her life around. She had experienced so much in such a short period of time... no wonder she always felt so much older than me.

Seventeen years after giving her baby up for adoption, Ellen's daughter found and contacted her.  It was a beautiful reunion and the hole in her heart was finally filled.

In March of this year, I listened to a woman tell quite a different story of her teenage pregnancy experience, as I sat in one of the presentation rooms of the United Nations.  The woman described the horrific emotional scars that plagued her after the abortion.  She withdrew into a world of isolation and attempted to end her own life.  No one ever told her that she would experience such a hellish aftermath. "No one ever told me," she thought. And that's when it hit her.. That's what she needed to do, speak up, warn, let the other young mothers know, gather similar stories like her own and tell people.  She began an organization called Silent No More.  I searched the website later that week and listened to one experience after the other.  The stories moved my heart to deep compassion.

I don't think there has ever been a year in my life where I've had so many thoughts of teenage pregnancies and the abortion crisis.

So, when my husband came to me wanting to have another baby, I poured out my heart to him.  I told him that I wanted to save a child and not just the infant... I wanted to save the child who was bearing that baby.  We prayed and my husband felt the Spirit witness to him that this was right and good.  He's 100% completely and totally on board, it's amazing!! There really aren't many closed adoptions now days, in fact ours will be open.  They've discovered that the child does much better when he or she knows who their biological parents are from the very beginning.

I find it more than a coincidence that in the group of homeschoolers I was divinely led to a year ago, one of the moms has successfully adopted three children.  We've talked several times recently and she's given me some great advice.  It was comforting to know she was able to adopt her newest baby for $3,000.  I know everything is going to work out.  I believe with all of this we will witness miracle upon miracle.  That's just the way God works when you step out into the dark with the light of faith.

-Alicia

"Abortion is not the answer. This only compounds the problem. It is an evil and repulsive escape that will someday bring regret and remorse.

Marriage is the more honorable thing. This means facing up to responsibility. It means giving the child a name, with parents who together can nurture, protect, and love.

When marriage is not possible, experience has shown that adoption, difficult though this may be for the young mother, may afford a greater opportunity for the child to live a life of happiness.....

...Every home, regardless of the cost of the house, can provide an environment of love which will be an environment of salvation.
... It is the spirit in that home, the extension of the love of a good man who holds the priesthood of God and a good woman whose heart is filled with true affection and gratitude, and of children born of a sound marriage who have been nurtured and reared in an environment of peace and faith and security.
...Save the children. Too many suffer and weep. God bless us to be mindful of them, to lift them and guide them as they walk in dangerous paths, to pray for them, to bless them, to love them, to keep them secure until they can run with strength of their own" - President Gordon B. Hinckley - Oct. 1994

Rally this summer 2015 - To peacefully protest Planned Parenthood

Me, Carol Allen, Kanani Horito, and Ann Takasaki