Ladies Lunch and Life-Hacks

Life is so incredibly busy right now that I hardly have an extra minute to write these days. Being a foster mom takes up more time than most people realize. When I do get a free moment, it's usually spent doing homework for my class this semester.  I know the things that consume my hours are good... Even though I don't sleep anymore. ;)

Despite my crammed schedule, I was able to break away just for a couple hours this afternoon and enjoy a nice visit with my sisters-in-law (well, at least 5 of the 7). We gathered at Merrit's house, made a fancy lunch, and shared life-hacks with each other.  A few of the life-hacks were practical and revolved around awesome cleaning or cooking tips.  The other life-hacks were spiritual, like Lee's and Megan's.  

Lee shared that she has noticed a big difference in her life and in her relationships as she's taken the time to kneel and pray more throughout the day.  Megan shared a few verses from the scriptures and her personal testimony of them.  

The life-hack I gave was about perspective: As mothers, sometimes we see a mess and instantly assume that it is a result of our children being lazy or goofing off. But I shared the idea that sometimes the so-called "disasters" around our homes are evidence that our children are actually listening, that they're working hard, that they're doing great and wonderful things... and I gave some examples.

From the practical temporal life-hacks to the spiritual and inspiring ones: we laughed, we cried, and felt so much appreciation and love for one another.  It was a very refreshing afternoon.  I'm so grateful I married into this beautiful family.  I'm glad I have these seven sisters who get together and include me as one of them. I love that we're close and have regular, meaningful, and memorable visits.  I look forward to spending next weekend with these same wonderful ladies. 

-Alicia

Time In / Time Out

Some of the best advice I've been given from the foster care support group was from a seasoned foster parent.  She said that for every time-out my foster daughter has to go to, give her time-in... meaning: hold her, play with her, talk to her.

Its been working.

As hard as it has been to show this increase of love after discipline, I've noticed that it has really helped.  And I don't see it as reinforcing the bad behavior because she still has the "time-out" but it's reinforcing her sense of being in a secure place, where there's no threat of abandonment.

Speaking of time-out...
I get to have a little one myself... but this is a good time-out, one I get to spend with all my sisters-in-law Feb. 17-18.  One of the guest speakers will be Tim Ballard.  I first heard him at World Congress in 2015 with my Big Ocean group.  If you don't know who he is, go watch the documentary, The Abolitionist. The story is mind-blowing, absolutely incredible!

Layton's 2017 Time Out for Women has a great line-up of speakers for the whole weekend. My sisters-in-law and I used to go to TOFW every year but it has been a while since we've gone last.  I'm excited! The awesome thing about it is, I'm always in the mood for more time-IN with ALL the children after this time-out.

-Alicia

Somebody Needs the Light You Have - Ponderize - Week 45

"Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works, 

and glorify your Father which is in heaven." 

- Matthew 5:16

"Jesus wants every one of us to know him because of the transforming power of that knowledge and because of the indescribable joy it brings into our lives. But the influence of the gospel is to extend beyond each individual. It is to be as a light that dispels the darkness from the lives of those around us. No one of us is saved solely and simply for himself alone, just as no lamp is lighted merely for its own benefit." - Elder Joseph B. Wirthlin

"Pushing Back The Dark"

The Impossible Dream

I know two songs from the movie though I don't recall ever watching it.  I've never read the book either... even though it has sat on my shelf for years.  When I was a little girl, I remember my mother singing The Impossible Dream and Man of Lamancha.  She'd dance through the kitchen like a cheerful songbird and often get the lyrics messed up... but she sang her heart out anyway.

After reading the book that came in the mail last week, I took interest in the way the author mentions Don Quixote in her last chapter.  It reads as follows:

After [Don Quixote] tells [Aldonza] of his quest - to follow the impossible dream - she pleads, "Once, just once - would you look at me as I really am?"
He gazes into her eyes and answers, "I see beauty.  Purity.  I see the woman each man holds secret within him. Duclinea."

...In his quest to "add some measure of grace to the world" he became alive to new visions, to the vision of one who values all life - Jesus Christ.

Though she fights his vision as being unrealistic, her heart longs for it to be true, and in time the presence of his love, gentleness, and glory transform her life and her very nature.  

His triumph in the quest to "add some measure of grace" comes as he lies upon his deathbed and Aldonza comes to see him.  
She cries for him to regain the quest, "Please!  Try to remember!"
"Is it so important?" he asks.
"Everything.  My whole life.  You spoke to me and everything was different!" she pleads.
As he fades and dies, she is resurrected into a new being and walks away with his quest instilled upon her heart, and thereafter calls herself, Dulcinea [which means -sweet above all that is sweet]."

The part she describes here sounded so familiar to me.
"I know this story" I thought to myself.  " I know it well."
 It's a story of transformation, a story of redemption, a story of what happens to a soul when someone sees them differently, when they are seen by the light of truth, and it awakes them to who they are meant to become no matter how impossible it might seem.

There's no doubt in my mind that God knows and loves us beyond our mortal comprehension.  He answers our prayers.  He has great plans, tailor-made opportunities, and custom-fit challenges to help us grow into who we're meant to be.
...And sometimes He sends angels to help us along our journey.   I will thank God for my angels every single day of my life.  How could I ever forget the measure of grace they added to my world?!  Their quest is my quest now. It is written and instilled deep upon my heart forever.

From Don Quixote

To dream the impossible dream

To fight the unbeatable foe

To bear with unbearable sorrow

And to run where

the brave dare not go

To right the unrightable wrong

And to love pure and chaste from afar

To try when your arms are too weary

To reach the unreachable star

This is my quest

To follow that star

No matter how hopeless

No matter how far

To fight for the right

Without question or pause

To be willing to march,

march into hell

For that heavenly cause

And I know

If I'll only be true

To this glorious quest

That my heart

Will lie peaceful and calm

When I'm laid to my rest

And the world will be

better for this

That one man, scorned

and covered with scars,

Still strove with his last

ounce of courage

To reach the unreachable,

the unreachable,

The unreachable star

And I'll always dream

The impossible dream

Yes, and I'll reach

The unreachable star

"It is not that something different is seen, but that one sees differently.

It is as though the spatial act of seeing were changed by a new dimension."

- Carl Jung

It came today!

I ordered a book last weekend from Amazon.  A friend of mine told me the title of this book his mom had written and so a few days later I decided to look it up.  I was so happy to find a copy in print... and it came in the mail today!!

 I've read one other book by this author in an online version and I've read about 10 or 12 pages from a  a book called, A More Perfect Union.

It looks like a super quick read but drawing from what I know, I'm certain that it will be very soul filling and highly edifying.  :)

-Alicia

The Gift of Listening

Once, I heard it said that when others listen to us it stirs creativity in our minds and hearts and inspires us to soar to greater heights.  I know I heard this somewhere and I should have written it down because I've searched and searched for the exact quote but can't find it now.  But in the process of searching, I found some other quotes that follow along the same line.

How grateful I am for those who listen!  I don't think they realize how much it motivates me just knowing that my voice is heard. It gives my words a destination, a place to rest, to belong to, and be held... instead of floating aimlessly in space.

These three quotes express this sentiment more clearly than I could on my own:

"What we call poetry does not simply set the heart free spontaneously, emerging when one is overwhelmed.  A simple recitation of a song when one is deeply moved does not make one cheerful, and does not bring sufficient satisfaction to that person.  Therefore, one finds consolation by making others listen to his song.  When others listen and they are moved, then one's heart brightens up considerably.... When we enquire about the origins of poetry, we see that it is crucial for poetry to have someone listen to and be moved by it.  The original nature of poetry is to provide words with patterns and to make them last long with the voice... There is no better way for someone to cheer up than by knowing that others have listened to his poem and have been moved by it.  If the listener is not moved, one's heart will hardly be set free." -  Norinaga Motoori

“When we are listened to, it creates us, makes us unfold and expand. Ideas actually begin to grow within us and come to life...It makes people happy and free when they are listened to." ― Brenda Uelande

"Writers are listeners as well as observers – not just to their own souls and the heartbeat of the world, but to the souls of others as well.  Listen to the world, and it will listen back." - Susan Hodgetts

To those who read this: with all my heart, thank you for listening!!
Today, I will strive to be a better listener to everyone around me than I was yesterday.
-Alicia

Long Live the Young At Heart

"You will experience greater joy in life as you eradicate adult-onset pessimism and substitute childlike optimism. Optimism is a virtue that allows us to see God’s loving hand in the details of our life. " - Anthony D. Perkins (Oct. 2006 Conference "The Great and Wonderful Love")

There's a magic to holding on to the inner child, to never losing that sense of wonder and excitement for life.  The spirit of play and optimism sets the soul free from its mortal shell in brilliant radiance.  Its illuminating fire is contagious as it ignites in the reflection of the eyes of all who capture it.

Run wild, live free, love strong!!

-Alicia

"Long Live"
by, For King and Country

If you’re playing that drum but you got no rhythm

If you’re a little out of key but you’re always singing

If you’re so carefree but so not careless

Such a wreck, but ain't love wreck-less

If you’re listening I hope you hear this

Long live the young at heart

You know who you are

With your spirit burning

Take a risk and take a chance

Carry on

Long live the soul set free

Don't be afraid to dream

While the world’s still turning

Every moment, make it happen

With two left feet

Keep on dancing

Beat by beat

Breath by breath

Walking hand in hand

Step by step

With drop of faith and childlike wonder

You can weather the lighting, you can brave the thunder

No road map, but keep on running

No parachute, but keep on jumping

Oh, I think you might be onto something

Beat by beat

Breath by breath

Walking hand in hand

Step by step

Here and now

Day by day

Won’t let this memory slip away

Every moment, make it happen

With two left feet

Keep on dancing

Beat by beat

Breath by breath

Walking hand in hand

Step by step