"All that [I] need" - Ponderize - Week 62

I like taking my kids to class with me at BYU. They always fight over who's turn it is since I only allow for one of them at a time.  All of them love it!  Well, almost all of them.... Chandler is the only one who doesn't really care to attend with me but he still loves to use the campus for his studies.  It works out great for him because he's only enrolled at the high school for his extracurricular classes. All his core classes are online so he can do those anywhere there is a computer.  His favorite thing is to use my student ID and password for the computers on campus to do his schoolwork.

This week is the last of my semester.  My foster son wanted to join me in my class tonight. He sat pretty quietly as he read the books he brought.  I was proud of his behavior.  

After the hour was finished, I walked my foster son over to the vending machines to let him pick a treat.  I think that's what he was looking forward to the most. He's envied the other kids when they've return from one of my classes with treats in hand.  He picked a soda and a pack of gum for his reward, skipping along with delight.

He wanted me to give him a tour of the whole campus. I walked him through a couple of buildings and drove him past a few more but said I'd have to save the rest for another time.  He seemed to really enjoy the opportunities this evening, asking when he'd be able to join me for class again. I told him I'd start up a couple more classes in January.  He was happy about that.

I've really enjoyed this semester.  So far, I'm getting the highest percentage grade out of everyone in my class (something I was not expecting at all).  I'm really excited about my final presentation for Saturday night. We're all giving our own short little Ted Talks; Mine will be about foster parenting.  I shared a portion of it in peer review today and got some great feedback. I'm so grateful I have this opportunity to go to school.  It is my dream come true!!  

I'm feeling really blessed in my life.  I think a good scripture for this week is 2 Corinthians 9:8,

"God is able to bless you abundantly, 

so that in all things at all times, 

having all that you need, 

you will abound in every good work." 

(NIV version)

-Alicia :)

"And Mary said..." - Ponderize - Week 61

In our church, we use the phrase "magnify the Lord in your calling" quite a bit.  I've been thinking what it means to magnify the Lord.  All too often, we might think this means exhausting ourselves to do more, be more, to run "faster than we have strength" in order to magnify our calling but we forget "the Lord" part.

In Luke 1:46, Mary, the mother of Christ said, "My soul doth magnify the Lord."

What does it mean to magnify something? It means to increase, extend, expand, intensify. 

If it is the Lord that is the one that is magnified first in our heart and mind then He becomes bigger, stronger, more powerful than the other things that may try to consume us... like our fears, our weaknesses, our anxieties, our doubts, and even our foolish pride.  

The problems and struggles we face may seem Goliath in size, but when our soul magnifies the Lord,  we see that God is bigger than any obstacle. With this knowledge, we can do as David did: We will "hasten and [run] toward" those giants, with full confidence that we "come to [our problems] in the name of the Lord of hosts, the God of the armies of Israel" so "that all the earth may know that there is a God in Israel." (1 Samuel 17:45, 46 & 48)

Through a vision that daily recognizes and embraces the all-consuming presence and power of God, we see that God is greater, He's stronger, He is more powerful than any troubles we face, and we will come off conquerors!! With God, we need not fear.   

-Alicia

Magnify

by, We Are Messengers

I Saw an Angel Fly - Ponderize - Week 60

"And I saw another angel fly in the midst of heaven, having the everlasting gospel
to preach unto them that dwell on the earth,
and to every nation, and kindred, and tongue, and people,

Saying with a loud voice, Fear God, and give glory to him;
for the hour of his judgment is come: and worship him that made heaven,
and earth, and the sea, and the fountains of waters."

 - Revelation 14:6-7

Serving God - Ponderize - Week 59

My foster son has been doing better these last few days. I can tell he's making a conscious effort to be a little more obedient to the rules and routines of our family.

Yesterday, he was watching Mormon Messages with Micah and was intrigued by the Christmas video where the man kept waiting for the Savior to come to his house as a guest but instead there only came a widow, an orphan, and a beggar. The story concludes with the scripture from Matthew 25:40.

As I quietly watched my foster son-- this kid who is so obviously a stranger and not one of my own--stare at the video, a wave of emotion filled my heart and the truth of the message gave me peace. "Don't give up. All that you do for this young boy, you are doing for Me." I felt strengthened in that moment with and a new vision to handle the increase stresses, anxieties, and conflicts.

In my personal scripture study this morning, I've just started Mosiah. I think this verse will be a good one for the week:

"Behold, I tell you these things that ye may learn wisdom; that ye may learn that when ye are in the service of your fellow beings, ye are only in the service of your God." - Mosiah 2:17

-Alicia

Applied and Personalized - Ponderize - Week 58

I didn't sleep more than four hours last night.  I experienced for the first time the uncontrollable screaming I was told about that the younger foster child sometimes displays. Kaylee got up and moved herself to the couch downstairs and Miriam moved into my bed while I stayed up trying to figure out what to do with our little foster girl. Joseph came in after a while to help me too. Neither of us got much sleep.

I have an eight page draft due for my writing class tomorrow. I only have three pages written so far but I've enjoyed the research and have actually discovered some of my findings in my topic to be healing and encouraging during this transition of being a foster family.

It's a brand new day and we get up and try again. We're going to make all this work, I know we will.

"Wherefore, the people of [Alicia and Joseph] did fortify [their day] with their [faith and prayers, with the word of the Lord], and with all their might, trusting in the God and rock of their salvation; wherefore, they became as yet, conquerors of their [trials]." - Jacob 7:25

- Alicia

Consecrate Thy Performance - Ponderize - Week 57

“There may be things in our character, in our behavior, or concerning our spiritual growth about which we need to counsel with Heavenly Father in morning prayer. …
“During the course of the day, we keep a prayer in our heart for continued assistance and guidance...
“We notice during this particular day that there are occasions where normally we would have a tendency to speak harshly, and we do not; or we might be inclined to anger, but we are not. We discern heavenly help and strength and humbly recognize answers to our prayer. Even in that moment of recognition, we offer a silent prayer of gratitude” (Bednar, David A., “Pray Always,” Ensign, Nov. 2008, 41–42).

But behold, I say unto you that ye must pray always, and not faint; that ye must not perform any thing unto the Lord save in the first place ye shall pray unto the Father in the name of Christ, that he will consecrate thy performance unto thee, that thy performance may be for the welfare of thy soul. 

- 2 Nephi 32:9

2 Nephi 25:26 - Ponderize - Week 56

The verse I've chosen to ponderize this week is from where I'm reading with my personal study in the Book of Mormon.  I love this scripture! It's a favorite to many and there's good reason...  It's awesome! 

"We talk of Christ, we rejoice in Christ, 
we preach of Christ, we prophesy of Christ, 

and we write according to our prophecies, 
that our children may know to what source 

they may look for a remission of their sins." 

- 2 Nephi 25:26

And like any awesome scripture, it makes it extra cool to have a song that goes with it--a song that makes you want to clap your hands and testify! Amen!! 

"If you’ve got pain

He’s a pain taker

If you feel lost

He’s a way maker"

-Zach Williams

-Alicia - (Make the Day Beautiful) ;)

"Exuberance" is a good word - Ponderize - Week 55

She turned to Miriam with an overly enthusiastic handshake and a sing-songy voice, "Hi!! My name is Elise!! I'm so happy you're here!! I'm going to be your very best friend!!"
Miriam wasn't interested in best friends or any friends for that matter.  She was upset that she had to go to a new ward in the first place and struggled to understand why we had to attend a completely different building when it really wasn't much further away than the chapel near our old place.
She gave Elise a half-smile and responded flatly, "Thanks."

After church, Miriam complained, "There's only two girls in Young Women's and the one that's my age is way too hyper."  She told me all about the chatty blond bubbly girl who flung herself into her personal space.
"Aren't you glad she was nice to you though?" I asked.
"Well... yeah, I guess so." She muttered quitely.
I continued, "Imagine walking into Young Women's and this girl was the type who was snarky and snobbish. Don't you think that would have been much more difficult to deal with?"
Miriam thought for a moment, "You're right.  I'm glad she was friendly.  I just think she needs to tone it down a bit."
I laughed understandingly, "Well, I bet she's super excited because she finally gets to have another girl her age in class.  I wonder how long it has been that they've only had two Young Women? Wouldn't you be happy?"

Yesterday was our second Sunday.  We sat in the row right behind Miriam's "new best friend"--she was holding her toddler sister, bouncing and playing with her in her lap. As soon as she saw Miriam out of the corner of her eye, she flipped around and extended her hand, "Hi again, it's so great to see you!" She said something about it being a beautiful day and then went back to playing with her sister.
Miriam leaned over to me and whispered, "That's her."
I guessed as much and whispered back, "I like her!"
She smiled warmly and I could tell that she was beginning to like her too.

After church, we gathered everyone in the van, "Where's Miriam?" I asked. Joseph pointed across the parking lot to Miriam and Elise, "They're walking home together. I guess all the youth from this ward walk home together. At least that's what one of the other parents was telling me."
"Really?" I thought, "That's so cool!"
Chandler watched as we began to drive by the group of youth, "let me out," he said.  He opened the side door of the van and ran to all the kids.  They didn't flinch and just let him mix right in.  It was so awesome to see! What a blessing!

I've been reading the Isaiah chapters in the Book of Mormon for my personal scripture study and as I read one of the verses, I couldn't help but think of Miriam's happy friend and how grateful I was that she wasn't stuck-up or arrogant in any way.  I really think that would have made our move much too difficult for her.

"And it shall come to pass that the lofty looks of man shall be humbled, and the haughtiness of men shall be bowed down, and the Lord alone shall be exalted in that day... The high ones of stature shall be hewn down; and the haughty shall be humbled... But with righteousness shall he judge the poor, and reprove with equity for the meek of the earth..." Isaiah 2:11, 10:33, 11:4

The verse I'm pondering for the week is The Message version of Galatians 5:22-23
 "But what happens when we live God’s way? He brings gifts into our lives, much the same way that fruit appears in an orchard—things like affection for others, exuberance about life, serenity. We develop a willingness to stick with things, a sense of compassion in the heart, and a conviction that a basic holiness permeates things and people. We find ourselves involved in loyal commitments, not needing to force our way in life, able to marshal and direct our energies wisely."

-Alicia

Be Thou Humble - By, Elder Steven E. Snow

Atonement of Peace - Ponderize - Week 54

Nephi was a prophet of God--a good and righteous man--but even he grieved because of how easily he felt anger towards his brothers.  He recognized that if he didn't do something to be rid of the contention within, it would eat him alive. "Why should I give way to temptations that the evil one have place in my heart to destroy my peace and afflict my soul? Why am I angry because of mine enemy?" - 2 Nephi 4:27

When I read the things that Nephi's brothers did to him, the human-nature side of me feels that he is justified in his anger towards them.  Yet, Nephi recognizes that peace cannot abide with resentment.

I cross referenced my scripture study this morning to Ephesians 4:31.  This is the verse I'll be pondering for the week.
"Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and clamour, and evil speaking, be put away from you, with all malice."

When we hold onto slights, refuse to forgive, and wallow in bitterness--it not only strangles our spirit but it slowly cripples and kills our physical body too.

Russel M. Nelson gave a fantastic talk back in 1989 entitled The Canker of Contention.  He said, "As we dread any disease that undermines the health of the body, so should we deplore contention, which is a corroding canker of the spirit.' ...President Ezra Taft Benson described contention as 'another face of pride.'"

Of course, we can only choose to get rid of the contention in our own heart.  Unfortunately, we cannot force or make others get rid of their bitterness and anger--making it very difficult for us to maintain kind or generous feelings towards them. So, what do we do?  We turn to our Mediator, our great Intercessor.  He understands completely and is the great healer of all wounds. He can help us to nurture feelings of compassion, understanding, and love that don't come naturally in such circumstances.

Nephi gains strength to forgive through the power of the atonement, he finds peace by turning his heart to the Savior, "Rejoice, O my heart, and cry unto the Lord, and say: O Lord, I will praise thee forever; yea, my soul will rejoice in thee, my God, and the rock of my salvation." - 2 Nephi 4:30

I too find strength in the atonement.  I'm so thankful for my Savior and the constant peace that I find in Him.

-Alicia

An Unseen Power- Ponderize - Week 53

We stayed up late last night with our kids huddled around the bedroom windows watching the most spectacular heavenly light show.  There's nothing quite as exciting as a good thunderstorm where the lighting bolts rhythmically dance in rapid succession brilliantly illuminating the panorama of the night sky.

I'm always dazzled by such displays of nature and I can't help but feel a little like Moses did when he witnessed the grandeur of God, "of the same he greatly marveled and wondered... Now... I know that man is nothing." (Moses 1:8&10)

Isn't it awesome to think that the Creator of all, the God of this Universe is our Father and that His power is not only available to us but that He wants to endow us, bestow, and enrich us with that same power!  It's not a small or inconsequential thing to have Him in your corner.

I absolutely loved the final hymn, Let Us All Press On, from General Conference yesterday. The choir sang it slower and with tremendous conviction. Tears were streaming down many of their faces as their souls bore personal testimony.

"Fear not though the enemy deride; 

Courage, for the Lord is on our side...

 If we do what's right we have no need to fear,

For the Lord, our helper, will ever be near;

In the days of trial his Saints he will cheer,

And prosper the cause of truth.

We will not retreat, though our numbers may be few

When compared with the opposite host in view;

But an unseen pow'r will aid me and you

In the glorious cause of truth."

I know there are dark and stormy clouds ahead and the prophesies of these last days are being fulfilled before our very eyes. But like electricity--we often cannot see it, yet the power of God is vibrant and living, ever-flowing around us. And in just the right moments the honest and faithful in heart will shine forth His power in a glorious display!

"Be strong and of a good courage, fear not, nor be afraid... for the Lord thy God, He it is that doth go with thee; He will not fail thee, nor forsake thee."- Deuteronomy 31:6

-Alicia

Hope, Love of God, and Love of Others - Ponderize - Week 52

We watched the Presidential Debate tonight as a family.  I don't favor either side and to be honest, I don't really like the two party system--I really don't think our founding fathers meant for us to have only two parties.

Anyway, something about watching this tonight gave me the same sinking feeling as I did watching the live coverage of the attacks on 9/11--It left my spirit feeling exhausted and sore. Name-calling, speaking over each other, and interrupting, are such terrible and useless ways of communication--it's not only ugly and immature but it spreads anger and hatred like a blazing wild fire.

The moderator asks both candidates what the biggest issue is facing America.  If you were to ask me what it is, I would NOT say it's economic, international relationships, equal rights, or any of the main things we hear.  I would say that our biggest threat to our nation is the incivility, increased meanness, and unrepentant contention being displayed on the internet, social media, in our schools, and in our streets.

Elder Oaks said the following at a convention last year, " We all lose when an atmosphere of anger or hostility or contention prevails,” he said.  “We all lose when we cannot debate public policies without resorting to boycotts, firings, and intimidation of our adversaries.”

I keep thinking of Avenger's Civil War and how the enemy's plan was to destroy the Avengers by tearing them apart from the inside-out, to turn good people on each other, and just let them destroy themselves. I feel like that's what is going to happen to us as Americans if we do not watch ourselves.

Right after the presidential arguing was over, we had a short Family Home Evening lesson in preparation for this weekend where we'll get to listen to Prophets and Apostles of God speak.  It was such a nice contrast to turn off the debate and redirect our conversation towards the things we loved from last General Conference and what we are looking forward to with this one.  There was an immediate difference in the atmosphere as we focused on true doctrine.

I'm grateful for the message Elder Oaks gave at BYU a few weeks ago entitled, Elections, Hope and Freedom.  I've listened to his talk several times now.  This next portion is what I feel like focusing on for my scripture to ponder this week.

"In the distressing circumstances that surround us, we must trust in God and His promises, and hold fast to the vital gospel teaching of hope.  The prophet, Nephi, taught that we must "press forward with a steadfastness in Christ, having a perfect brightness of hope, and a love of God, and of all men"(*)... Hope is a characteristic Christian virtue;  I am glad to practice it and to recommend it to counter all current despair.  Hope based on trust in the Lord and His promises has sustained me through all the circumstances of my life." - Elder Dallin H. Oaks


-Alicia

Meekness, the Subtraction of Self - Ponderize - Week 51

Yesterday in Sunday School, the lesson focused on the beatitudes.  The attribute or virtue that seemed to take up most of the class discussion was meekness:  This is something I am trying to learn more in my life.  The talk "Meekly Drenched In Destiny" was referred to through several points - It's one of my favorite Neal A. Maxwell sermons - I don't think I could ever listen to it enough because I'm in constant need of these reminders.  I reviewed it again this morning and zeroed in on this section:

"Those of us who are too concerned about status or being last in line or losing our place need to reread those words about how the “last shall be first” and the “first shall be last” (Matthew 19:30). Assertiveness is not automatically bad, of course, but if we fully understood the motives which underlie some of our acts of assertion, we would be embarrassed. Frankly, when others perceive such motivations, they are sometimes embarrassed for us.

Granted, the meek go on fewer ego trips, but they have far greater adventures. Ego trips, those “travel now and pay later” indulgences, are always detours. The straight and narrow path is the only path which takes us to new and breathtaking places.

Meekness means less concern over being taken for granted and more concern over being taken by the hand. Less concern over revising our own plans for us and more concern about adopting His plans for us are other sure signs of meekness....
...Meekness is not a display of humility; it is the real thing. True meekness is never proud of itself, never conscious of itself."

These are the things that have been stirring in my heart and I want so much to be more humble. I want to learn these vital attributes, to be truly and sincerely meek.  The scripture that comes to my mind as a good one to ponder for the week is Mosiah 4:11

" I say unto you as I have said before, that as ye have come to the knowledge of the glory of God, or if ye have known of his goodness and have tasted of his love, and have received a remission of your sins, which causeth such exceedingly great joy in your souls, even so I would that ye should remember, and always retain in remembrance, the greatness of God, and your own nothingness, and his goodness and long-suffering towards you, unworthy creatures, and humble yourselves even in the depths of humility, calling on the name of the Lord daily, and standing steadfastly in the faith of that which is to come, which was spoken by the mouth of the angel."

-Alicia

Be Not Weary - Ponderize - Week 50

I read this scripture differently this morning.  It spoke more to me in the context of a wife and mother rather than missionary work or church service.

I almost read it as, "Alicia, don't let twists and turns, bumps and bruises in life wear you so thin that you're too tired to give meaningful focus to your family, create joyful experiences, and make time for listening, really listening."

Synonyms to the word "weary" are: "bored, impatient, indifferent, fed-up, or sick of" (Any of these could be inserted below to add a little more depth to counsel.)

"Be not weary in well-doing" sounds like a strong command to make a conscious effort, a very deliberate effort to say and do those things that increase the spiritual, mental, emotional, and physical health or "wellness" of my family no matter how much stress and strain I might feel pulling on me.

This will be a great verse to ponder for the week.  As I think of it each day, I have a goal to visualize and apply what tirelessly nourishing the health of my family looks and sounds like:
Wherefore, be not weary in well-doing, for ye are laying the foundation of a great work. And out of small things proceedeth that which is great. - D&C 64:33

-Alicia

All Planned Out - Ponderize - Week 49

I'm delighted to share what I found in my scriptures this morning and what I'll be pondering on for the week!  Now, the verse I'm sharing is from a very modern translation of the Bible and I know that as members of the church we usually stick to the KJV but I really, really like how this verse comes to life with The Message version:

"This is God’s Word on the subject... I’ll show up and take care of you as I promised and bring you back home. I know what I’m doing. I have it all planned out—plans to take care of you, not abandon you, plans to give you the future you hope for.
When you call on me, when you come and pray to me, I’ll listen.
When you come looking for me, you’ll find me.
Yes, when you get serious about finding me and want it more than anything else, I’ll make sure you won’t be disappointed.
I’ll turn things around for you. I’ll bring you back from all the countries into which I drove you—God’s Decree—bring you home to the place from which I sent you off into exile. You can count on it."

- Jeremiah 29:11-14

I also really like how it sounds in the first couple verses of the NIV version:

 "For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.  Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you.  You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.  I will be found by you,” declares the Lord,” 

- Jeremiah 29:11-13

I found a little song that seems fitting for the verse too.  I find peace when I remember that God has everything under control.  It will all work out! :)

-Alicia

"I Am In Your Midst" - Ponderize - Week 48

Like the rushing of a furious wind, rapid changes have been happening all around these past couple of months and I feel as if I'm being swept in a current beyond my control.  When I try to stop, it seems the wrenching force increases and I surrender again, facing the fact that I am bound to a destination I cannot see.

Fall Semester starts for me today.  I contemplated dropping my class because of all the dramatic changes we are going through at this time but I couldn't do it.  I feel very strongly that I need to take at least one class every fall and winter and that by the grace of God I'll make it through no matter the difficulty of my schedule or circumstances.

Here I am again at the crossroads... A distinct and noticeable ache presses on my heart.  All of my belongings are packed and I'm heading out into an unknown future.  In just a few short weeks I'll be living in a new home and a new ward.  Leaving the watchcare of our current bishop is undeniably difficult.  I'm forever grateful for his faith, his prayers, his testimony, his priesthood blessings, his leadership, and for the activities and events he has inspired in this area.  What a vision has taken place!  Our experiences here have been absolutely magical.  They've created a sublime level of unity I've never realized possible in a ward family.  Words cannot adequately express my gratitude for our bishop. One can't leave a place like this without a void being made, a recognizable hole.  The scar tissue will serve as a reminder of how much I miss what was once there.

Something is happening within this  newly-formed Freedom Stake, something miraculous.  There are many who feel it.  We are witnessing Zion being built, a very real and literal Zion.  It may be hard to believe but if one could experience a fraction of what I've tried to describe, they would know without a doubt for themselves that the hand of God is on this people.  As this heavenly gathering takes place, there will also be great dissensions.  I pray our roots will be strong and deep in fertile soil.

These changes taking place are Divinely appointed, of that I'm sure.  We cannot see the future, we are not meant to see it... for our faith must be strengthened, our faith must be fortified, and our faith must be exercised if we are to have it become unshaken. Time will move swiftly and it is essential that our priorities stay in order: Faith and family first.

I am confident that once we move into our new home, we will receive the permanent placements of foster children.  Excitement and fear both prod my mind as I contemplate this prospect.
Excitement: To care for these children who desperately need a family, these refugees who need someone to love them unconditionally and to know that they belong somewhere.
And Fear: For all the dynamics involved in becoming the mother of someone else's children seemingly overnight, to be committed to loving them and caring for them as if they are my own. While at the same time, I must remain ever mindful of my own children and monitor carefully the anxieties and stresses they will inevitably be under living with new siblings complete with habits and mannerisms absolutely foreign to them.

I searched through my scriptures this morning, seeking to find one that I could ponder for the week -from the Psalms of David, to the Acts of the Apostles, to verses in the Book of Mormon, and so on.
I finally settled with this one in Doctrine and Covenants:

"Behold, verily, verily, I say unto you that mine eyes are upon you. I am in your midst and ye cannot see me;  But the day soon cometh that ye shall see me, and know that I am; for the veil of darkness shall soon be rent, and he that is not purified shall not abide the day. Wherefore, gird up your loins and be prepared. Behold, the kingdom is yours, and the enemy shall not overcome." 

- D&C 38:7-9

I don't know what the future holds, but I know Who holds the future.  He is in our midst and I trust this.

-Alicia

Bullet Proof - Ponderize - Week 47

Tonight, we had a family lesson on the story of Moses when he spoke with God face to face, when he experienced the glory of heaven and witnessed the vast expanse of the Lord's creations.
Elder Jeffrey R. Holland expounds, "What happened to Moses next, after his revelatory moment, would be ludicrous if it were not so dangerous and so absolutely true to form. In an effort to continue his opposition, in his unfailing effort to get his licks in later if not sooner, Lucifer appeared and shouted in equal portions of anger and petulance after God had revealed himself to the prophet, saying, 'Moses, worship me.' But Moses was not having it. He had just seen the real thing, and by comparison this sort of performance was pretty dismal.

Moses looked upon Satan and said: 'Who art thou? . . . where is thy glory, that I should worship thee?
For behold, I could not look upon God, except his glory should come upon me. . . . But I can look upon thee in the natural man. . . .
. . . Where is thy glory, for it is darkness unto me? And I can judge between thee and God. . . .
Get thee hence, Satan; deceive me not.' [Moses 1:13–16]" 

After discussing this story with our children, I thought of the power of Truth and reflected on the conversation I had with a friend this morning about the scriptures.  She pointed out the verse in Helaman 5:12 the verse that promises if we are built on the foundation of Christ "that when the devil shall send forth his ... shafts in the whirlwind... it shall have no power over you to drag you down to the gulf of misery and endless wo."  (My friend admitted she didn't really know the word "shafts"  so she looked it up and discovered it meant weapons.) When she shared this, it made the verse even more significant, especially in connection with these other verses in the scriptures;

"No weapon that is formed against thee shall prosper.... This is the heritage of the servants of the Lord, and their righteousness is of me, saith the Lord." Isaiah 54:17

"For the Lord will go before you; and the God of Israel will [have your back]." - Isaiah 52:12

All I could think of was that with God we have the greatest power of the universe on our side and that we can actually be "bullet proof" to sniper attacks from the Adversary.

I wasn't there with Moses on the mountain to witness his encounters with heaven and hell.  Oh what an experience that would have been!  Just imagine the "casting out" scene when Moses calls upon the power of God to command Satan to leave. If I had been there, I probably would've liked to play a little song for the occasion remembering always Who has my back and Who makes me strong:

You shout it out,

But I can't hear a word you say

I'm talking loud, not saying much

I'm criticized but all your bullets ricochet

Shoot me down, but I get up

I'm bulletproof, nothing to lose

Fire away, fire away

Ricochet, you take your aim

Fire away, fire away

You shoot me down but I won't fall

I am titanium

You shoot me down but I won't fall

I am titanium

Cut me down

But it's you who'll have further to fall

Ghost town and haunted love

Raise your voice, sticks and stones may break my bones

I'm talking loud not saying much

I'm bulletproof, nothing to lose

Fire away, fire away

Ricochet, you take your aim

Fire away, fire away

You shoot me down but I won't fall

I am titanium

- Alicia

"Wise Counsel" Ponderize - Week 46

I've been thinking a lot about the beatitudes and how I desire with all my heart to be a better peacemaker: To be careful how I speak to myself and to others, to be stripped of envy, to be a better listener, and to be more thoughtful with my time - especially in my own home.

It's Education Week at BYU and I'm taking a few classes between now and Friday.  I am so excited to be uplifted and enlightened!!  I wish their was a way I could make the things I learn stick better in my brain... especially in those life-moments of testing.  I guess that comes with lots of time, lots of practice, and the grace of God.  I'm looking forward to learning!!

Dear Father, Help me to "hear counsel, and receive instruction, that [I] mayest be wise in [the] end." - Proverbs 19:20

-Alicia

Somebody Needs the Light You Have - Ponderize - Week 45

"Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works, 

and glorify your Father which is in heaven." 

- Matthew 5:16

"Jesus wants every one of us to know him because of the transforming power of that knowledge and because of the indescribable joy it brings into our lives. But the influence of the gospel is to extend beyond each individual. It is to be as a light that dispels the darkness from the lives of those around us. No one of us is saved solely and simply for himself alone, just as no lamp is lighted merely for its own benefit." - Elder Joseph B. Wirthlin

"Pushing Back The Dark"

Lord, I pray! - Ponderize - Week 44

I have two scriptures I'm ponderizing this week.

The first one, I've chosen to ponder is a version from the New Living Translation:

"Keep on asking, and you will receive what you ask for. 

Keep on seeking, and you will find. 

Keep on knocking, and the door will be opened to you." 

- Matt 7:7

And the second is David's Psalm:

 "Delight thyself also in the Lord; and he shall give thee the desires of thine heart.  

Commit thy way unto the Lord; trust also in him; and he shall bring it to pass." 

-Psalm 37:4-5

-Alicia

"Which God for us prepared..." Ponderize - Week 43

We sang "Come Come, Ye Saints" yesterday for our closing hymn in Sacrament meeting.  I couldn't hold back the tears as I sung the words, especially this part.  It felt so personal to our family situation.

We'll find the place which God for us prepared,

Far away in the West,

Where none shall come to hurt or make afraid;

There [your children] will be blessed.

This verse really struck Joseph too and we talked about it later.  We have both felt that the Lord is preparing a very specific place for our family, a place where our children and our foster children can thrive and feel free to be who they are.... And a place that will open our options to what children we are able to take in.  Currently in this apartment, we could only take in one boy and or one girl.  But if we found a home with four large enough rooms, it would open the options for us to take in two boys, or maybe two girls, or one of each.  It even opens the option of a possible third foster kid. We're expanding our search to Springville and Orem.

Could the place which He has prepared for us also be "far away in the west"? Today, I found a lovely little four bedroom home on the far west side of Provo that seems to have everything we are looking for.  It's not in the "beautiful place" I love so much... Oh, how I wish it was.  But just the same, the early saints had to leave their Nauvoo which means "Beautiful Place." 

Wherever we end up, I know it will be exactly where we need to be. Yet, I will never forget all I have come to love so much here. This place will always feel like home to me.  It's forever in my mind and memory, never to be forgotten - It is far too important.

I will come back to my little skating place too on occasion, maybe some late evening when I need a moment to myself to unwind.  And just like I've done since I was a kid, I'll have my wheels, my skates, my board, and my headphones; everything I need to bring back my mojo.

We really don't know where we are going yet but we know Who is taking us there.  I've got a feeling that the biggest part of the adventure is yet to be!

"And if I [the Lord] go and prepare a place for you,

 I will come again, and receive you unto myself; 

that where I am, there ye may be also.

And whither I go ye know, and the way ye know."

- John 14:3

  -Alicia

Far Away and Anywhere