Throwback Thursday - Beautiful

 I know so many women who have a naturally beautiful face, no make-up needed to be absolutely gorgeous. (I envy that.) These women always seem to look so classy in their dress styles too. Truth be told, I've never been extremely confident about my looks or appearance. I feel like it is such a wasted effort. I would never call this insecurity of mine "humility," In fact, I consider it to be one of my deepest weaknesses. One way I try to cope with this insecurity is to remind myself that a wardrobe of fashionable clothes and a glamorous face doesn't matter at all to God.

We live in a world that is obsessed with appearances. People spend inordinate amounts of money and time to stay looking young and attractive.  They pour themselves into programs, magazines, lectures, and all the latest fashions to glamorize themselves, to gather attention, and to be recognized. Eventually, time will take its toll on all of us and this surface beauty will crumble to the grave.

In the New Testament, 1 Peter 3:3-4 says,
"Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes. Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight."

Almost seven years ago, I wrote a blog post about true beauty:

When I was in my late teens my family had a wonderful couple for hometeachers, Brother and Sister Anderson. They were an older couple, probably in their late 70's. They always had a sparkle in their eyes and a smile on their face(I called it perma-grin). They were filled to the brim with gratitude for everyone and everything around them. I never heard a disparaging remark come out of their mouth. They spoke freely about God, His mercy and blessings. Their testimony of the Savior was not just in word but in the choices they made every day of their lives. They were a beautiful example of charity and oneness in marriage and of Christlike love for everyone. They shined so bright! I loved to be around them and glean from their wisdom.

About five years ago, I saw Brother Anderson in the temple...His physical health had declined for he needed to constantly be on oxygen and he carried a cane but he still had that strong and vibrant spirit... he hugged me and gave his regards to my family. His eyes shined as bright as ever and he still had that warmth of spirit that could soften any frozen heart.

I will never forget this wonderful couple! What an impression they made on me... they helped me see what true beauty is!

I still believe what I wrote back then;
I think sometimes, I just need a little reminder. :)
-Alicia

Light the World

Today is the day: The worldwide day of service! 

From now until Christmas, we will consciously look for ways to reach and serve people in a way we would imagine the Savior doing. 

From my own experiences, I'm FOREVER grateful and will always hold in my heart those who have shined their LIGHT in my life and made my world so much brighter.

Dec. 1:  Jesus lifted other's burdens. What will you do today to lift another's burden?

#LIGHTtheWorld

Light the World 

Calendar

Somebody Needs the Light You Have - Ponderize - Week 45

"Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works, 

and glorify your Father which is in heaven." 

- Matthew 5:16

"Jesus wants every one of us to know him because of the transforming power of that knowledge and because of the indescribable joy it brings into our lives. But the influence of the gospel is to extend beyond each individual. It is to be as a light that dispels the darkness from the lives of those around us. No one of us is saved solely and simply for himself alone, just as no lamp is lighted merely for its own benefit." - Elder Joseph B. Wirthlin

"Pushing Back The Dark"

Beauty Divine

"I looked and beheld a tree... and the beauty thereof was far beyond, 

yea, exceeding of all beauty."

(1 Nephi 11:8)

Breathtaking vision, It's a sight to behold,

Something about it that never grows old.

Its brilliance is timeless and shines like the Son-

Bright as the day heav'n and earth become one.

Age will not tarnish purest beauty Divine

Each passing year only ripen, refine

Growing in majesty and flourishing grace,

Kindness, compassion, a smiling face,

Inspiring virtue, fine-tuned affection

Hope, friendship, joy, and human connection.
A new Spirit within from heaven above
Constantly reaching with a Christlike love,

Everlasting beauty that conquers the grave

Lives on in the soul and all that they gave.

by, Alicia Rawlins

Tree of Life by, Audiomachine

“I believe the Savior is telling us that unless we lose ourselves in service to others, there is little purpose to our own lives. Those who live only for themselves eventually shrivel up and … lose their lives, while those who lose themselves in service to others grow and flourish—and in effect save their lives.” - President Thomas S. Monson

"I have come to know that it is the love of God and neighbor that gives meaning to life. May we follow our Savior’s example and His admonition to reach out to others with love." - Cheryl A. Esplin

"There is no happiness in having or in getting, but only in giving." - Henry Drummond

"You will find as you look back upon your life that the moments when you have truly lived are the moments when you have done things in the spirit of love." - Henry Drummond

Tour the Temple

This is a really cool in-depth tour of the symbols and design of the new Provo City Center Temple.  We watched it as a family tonight.  Enjoy!

Looking On the Heart - Ponderize - Week 20

What is "the heart" of something?... The core, the center, the life-blood.  Today in my scripture study, I cross-referenced back and forth in verses and found myself reading 1 Samuel 16 where David was chosen through the Lord's prophet.

"For the Lord seeth not as man seeth; for man looketh on the outward appearance, but the Lord looketh on the heart." - 1 Samuel 16:7

In the later verse, David is described as "ruddy, and withal of a beautiful countenance, and goodly to look to." Or in the modern language Bible it says David was "the very picture of health—bright-eyed, good-looking."  To me, this makes verse seven all the more significant. Someday David would become feeble and elderly and he'd lose that "picture of health." But that's not where the Lord was looking.

There's no way around it in life for any of us.   We all will grow old some day and with the price the world puts on appearances, we may wish and hope for a fountain of youth wherewith we could somehow switch out our inevitable cup of age and fragility. But at last, this cannot be.

We learn very young to analyze, observe, judge, and study... we do this through our first physical senses and most especially with our eyes.  But the "Lord seeth not as man seeth."  There is something incredible about God's vision that He wants us to discover here in this life.  There is so much beyond our physical experience.

From this last General Conference, Elder Bednar related this touching story:

"Several years ago I spent a Sunday afternoon with Elder Hales in his home as he was recovering from a serious illness. We discussed our families, our quorum responsibilities, and important experiences.

At one point I asked Elder Hales, 'You have been a successful husband, father, athlete, pilot, business executive, and Church leader. What lessons have you learned as you have grown older and been constrained by decreased physical capacity?'

Elder Hales paused for a moment and responded, 'When you cannot do what you have always done, then you only do what matters most.'"

Our Spirit is our core, our very center, the heart of who we are and who we will become and this is the means by which God judges, He sees, He communicates, and He loves.  Focusing on the true identity of others and nurturing /cultivating the Divine within ourselves (our heart, our Spirit) is the key to real lasting magnificent beauty, the kind that will never grow old, for the soul is evergreen...

-Alicia

"This is my desire consume me like a fire, 'cause I just want something beautiful" by, Needtobreathe

A Marvelous Father

Yesterday, I had the privilege of attending the homecoming of my nephew, Dane.  What a solid, good, and pure young man!  I'm so incredibly proud of him.  He's such a naturally righteous soul: timid like a lamb on the outside but roaring like a lion with bold testimony on the inside.  Once, I asked his mother the secret to raising such an amazing kid.  She shook her head at me with surprise, "Alicia, you have no idea... honestly, he came that way.  He is unlike any other, I've never had a child so naturally obedient." I thought to myself, "She's been blessed with a 'Nephi.'"

The messages in Sacrament meeting yesterday were beautiful; centered on charity, the pure love of Christ.  Then Nephi... I mean Dane, concluded his testimony of miracles and angels (both seen and unseen.) I smiled.

In Sunday school we discussed 1 Nephi 8 and the Tree of Life and in Relief Society we learned about the Kingdom of God established on earth as it is in Heaven.  

I took mental note of the talk referenced in Sunday school by Robert D. Hales entitled, "With all the Feeling of a Tender Parent." Still thinking of my sister-in-law's comment and the varying dispositions of our children... what about Lehi's children?  What a contrast between Nephi and his brothers! How much did this affect the emotions of their father?

• "The hymn often sung by our pioneer ancestors tells us what to do: “Gird up your loins; fresh courage take. / Our God will never us forsake.”  That courage and faith is what we need as parents and families in these latter days.
• Father Lehi had such courage. He loved his family and rejoiced that some of his children kept the Lord’s commandments. But he must have been heartbroken when his sons “Laman and Lemuel partook not of the fruit” representing the love of God. “He exceedingly feared for [them]; yea, he feared lest they should be cast off from the presence of the Lord.” - Elder Robert D. Hales

Lehi was an incredible father; devoted, loving, and true to the Faith!! Some of his children chose to follow his counsel and others refused.  In all of his ups and downs, joys and heartache... I can't help but wonder if he ever just needed some affirmation for his valiant efforts, some reassurance that he was a good father, a marvelous father, regardless of the choices his children were making. (If he lived down the street from me, I'd take a moment to tell him that.) ;)

• "Our worthiness will not be measured according to their righteousness. Lehi did not lose the blessing of feasting at the tree of life because Laman and Lemuel refused to partake of its fruit. Sometimes as parents we feel we have failed when our children make mistakes or stray. Parents are never failures when they do their best to love, teach, pray, and care for their children. Their faith, prayers, and efforts will be consecrated to the good of their children. "  - Elder Robert D. Hales

Also, if  Lehi were my neighbor, I think I'd encourage him with this too;

• "Remember, remember all the days of your [fatherhood]: 'Ye have not come thus far save it were by the word of Christ with unshaken faith in him, relying wholly upon the merits of him who is mighty to save.'
• Rely on Him. Rely on Him heavily. Rely on Him forever. And 'press forward with a steadfastness in Christ, having a perfect brightness of hope.'  You are doing God’s work. You are doing it wonderfully well. He is blessing you and He will bless you, even—no, especially—when your days and your nights may be the most challenging." - Elder Jeffrey R. Holland

I offer my prayers for all those parents who strive so diligently to keep that brightness of hope alive in the midst of storms and pending gloom.  Keep shining!  Your light is seen by many and it warms their hearts... God will bless you for keeping that fire burning in your soul! It's beautiful!

-Alicia ;) 

Reaching

My kids have the opportunity of participating in the Cultural Celebration and Temple dedication for the Provo, City Center Temple.  They had their first dance practice last night.  Afterwards, my son came home and told me the song they are performing to was "Reaching" by, Audiomachine.  I thought to myself "That's perfect! Absolutely perfect" because whenever I think of Audiomachine, I think of their album, "Tree of Life."  This temple and the Tree of Life have long been tied together in story for me. 

• "To appoint unto them that mourn in Zion, to give unto them beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning, the garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness; that they might be called trees of righteousness, the planting of the Lord, that he might be glorified." - Isaiah 61:3

This temple is a symbol of incredible beauty, shining like a light, a symbol of a new life, of redemption from the ruins, of triumph through tragedy, and holiness out of heartbreak... How glorious it is, to rise from the ashes, and constantly reach to a higher and more noble place no matter the cost.  Through Christ, all things are possible.  The Lord is aware of our every need and every struggle.  He is mighty to save and there is nothing we can't make it through when we rely and trust in His wisdom and grace.  He is so very good... all is well... all is well.

• "This one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind, and reaching forth unto those things which are before, I press toward the mark for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus." - Philippians 3:13

• "For ye have not come thus far save it were by the word of Christ with unshaken faith in him, relying wholly upon the merits of him who is mighty to save. Wherefore, ye must press forward with a steadfastness in Christ, having a perfect brightness of hope, and a love of God and of all men. " -2 Nephi 31: 19-20

• "He saw other multitudes pressing forward; and they came and caught hold of the end of the rod of iron; and they did press their way forward, continually holding fast to the rod of iron, until they came forth and fell down and partook of the fruit of the tree." 1 Nephi 8:24

-Alicia :)

Come Together

Organizing the inventory on the shelves in the back room of Sears shoe department was my responsibility when there were very few customers on the sales floor.  I was seventeen and though it wasn't the most exciting part-time work, it still gave me a paycheck.  I beat the boring doldrums in the backroom with my multi-cassette anthology album of The Beatles.  No doubt that when my headphones were in, I unknowingly serenaded a few passing customers to "Hey Jude."  I must have listened to that anthology a hundred times.  Something close to an obsession, I went through a phase of my own Beetle's mania.  Have you ever looked up the lyrics to "Come Together?" Yeah.... all this time, I've been singing it wrong.  I always wondered what it meant by, "hold you in his armchair or Morris Jumboo." (Those lyrics, even when they're sung right, never made sense anyway.)  Toe jam football?  Joo joo eyeballs?  Those guys were so high but I still loved them.

I seem to associate everything in life with music and for some reason, every time I hear a talk on unity or Zion, "Come Together" begins to play in my head (not exactly saturated with religious analogy, I know.) Even still, one morning, I thought it would make the perfect wake-up song to bring our kids out for family scripture study. so I turned on the living room speakers and I sang into the hall, "Come together, right now... and we'll read."  Don't try that at home, your kids will hate you forever.  (Just saying.) It was fun for me.

But speaking of coming together, of unity, and of studying scripture.  I've been thinking about the gathering that is happening in these last days.  Traveling to the United Nations and experiencing World Congress last year helped open my eyes to this incredible miracle that is happening right now.  People of all faiths and religions, Jews, Christians, and Muslims all working together to defend religious freedom and the family.

President Henry B. Eyring expounds on this principle:
"We see increased conflict between peoples in the world around us. Those divisions and differences could infect us. That is why my message of hope today is that a great day of unity is coming...

The Lord’s prophets have always called for unity. The need for that gift to be granted to us and the challenge to maintain it will grow greater in the days ahead, in which we will be prepared as a people for our glorious destiny....  
You have seen evidence, as I have, that we are moving toward becoming one. The miracle of unity is being granted to us as we pray and work for it in the Lord’s way. Our hearts will be knit together in unity. God has promised that blessing to His faithful Saints whatever their differences in background and whatever conflict rages around them. He was praying for us as well as His disciples when He asked His Father that we might be one. The reason that we pray and ask for that blessing is the same reason the Father is granting it. We know from experience that joy comes when we are blessed with unity."

Having our hearts and spirits knit together in purpose, in love, in light, and in truth is the way to joy.  I have experienced this for myself and know it to be true.
It's no coincidence to me that right smack in the middle of Lehi's and Nephi's vision of the Tree of Life, you find this verse, "And blessed are they who shall seek to bring forth my Zion at that day, for they shall have the gift and the power of the Holly ghost; and if they endure unto the end they shall be lifted up at the last day, and shall be saved in the everlasting kingdom of the Lamb; and whoso shall publish peace, yea, tidings of great joy, how beautiful upon the mountains shall they be." - 1 Nephi 13:37

No matter how fiery the trial that comes, no matter the struggle, no matter the midst of darkness or the persecution that settles around us, I pray my heart will never lose courage.  I pray I will keep the vision of hope alive, the vision of Zion and trust that "They that be with us are more than they that be with them." (2 Kings 6:16.)  
For "There is hope smiling brightly before us, and we know that deliverance is nigh." -Hymn 19

-Alicia

For the Ordinary

Ever make yourself a commitment when you wake up in the morning to be a little better at something than you were the day before?  And maybe it's because you're too overly focused on that virtue that you miss the mark?  I don't know but I did not feel very patient yesterday.  It wasn't like I was rude or mean but I was definitely below par and I wasn't as grateful as I should have been.

It could have been associated with starting my day with shopping for kids clothes.  Shopping is not my idea of fun.  I like to get what I need and get out!

I tried to make things a little more exciting by taking the children and their friends to a dollar movie afterwards.  Miriam wanted to pick "Goosebumps" because she read all the books.  Chandler didn't like the idea but decided because it had Jack Black in it, he might enjoy some parts.  (Truth be told, it was pretty lame and I kept volunteering to go out to the lobby to re-fill the kids popcorn bucket.  Shhh just let them think I was doing it to be nice.)

Anyway, I began to feel disappointed in myself for not smiling more, for not... well... being happier.

At the end of the day, as I was driving home from the Wash Hut with a van full of laundry, I thought to myself, "You kinda bombed it today, Alicia.  Come on, you can do better than this."  I pulled into the apartment and my husband rushed down the stairs to help me bring the baskets in.  He was happy and helpful and had a spring in his step.  I was so glad to close the day with his bright attitude, glad that I have him and my four beautiful children.  And I was glad when I woke up this morning because I get to start over and try to be a little better today.

This is my take-away for the week- this is what truly matters most... 

I just need to practice this more.  :)

"Instead of grumbling and murmuring, we should be consolidating and reflecting, which would not be possible if life were an uninterrupted sequence of fantastic scenery, confrontive events, and exhilarating conversation.

Patience helps us to use, rather than to protest, these seeming flat periods of life, becoming filled with quiet wonder over the past and with anticipation for that which may lie ahead, instead of demeaning the particular flatness through which we may be passing at the time. We should savor even the seemingly ordinary times, for life cannot be made up all of kettledrums and crashing cymbals. There must be some flutes and violins. Living cannot be all crescendo; there must be some dynamic contrast.

Clearly, without patience we will learn less in life. We will see less; we will feel less; we will hear less. "Ironically, “rush” and “more” usually mean “less.” The pressure of “now,” time and time again, go against the grain of the gospel with its eternalism.

There is also in patience a greater opportunity for that discernment which sorts out the things that matter most from the things that matter least. The mealtime episode of the Savior in the home of Mary and Martha is an example. Anxious, impatient Martha focused on getting food on the table while Mary wisely chose “the good part”—companionship and conversation instead of calories—a good choice, the Savior said, which would not be taken from her." -Elder Neal A. Maxwell - 1979 BYU Speech - Patience

-Alicia

"Trees of Righteousness" - Ponderize - Week 13

This is my verse for the week:

"To appoint unto them that mourn in Zion, to give unto them beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning, the garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness; that they might be called trees of righteousness, the planting of the Lord, that he might be glorified." - Isaiah 61:3

-Alicia

The Refiner's Fire

I've accomplished my goal of finishing the Old Testament before the end of the year.  In the last few pages I studied, there are a couple of verses that have stood out to me:

"I will bring the [righteous] through the fire, and will refine them as silver is refined, and will try them as gold is tried:  they shall call on my name, and I will hear them:  I will say, It is my people: and they shall say, The Lord is my God." - Zechariah 13:9

"Who may abide the day of His coming? and who shall stand whe He appeareth? For He is like a refiner's fire" - Malachi 3:2

As I read these verses, the last part of the hymn "Consider the Lilies of the Field" began to play in my mind and I found myself humming, "and make their hearts as gold."

I did some research about the refining of gold and of silver and discovered that gold is refined at 1,947° F  and silver at 1,450º F.  It is at these unbelievable temperatures that the dross surfaces, turns into a powdered condition in which it is driven away by an air blast.  http://biblehub.com/topical/r/refining.htm

The intensity of the heat and the way in which the dross surfaces and blows away is absolutely fascinating to me. It sounds agonizingly painful when you consider in the scriptures that we too must be refined.  The ways in which this happens for each of us varies almost as much as the stars in the sky. But to know the purpose and the end result can bring an immense amount of peace.

What fires must I go through? God only knows. And maybe it's better that I can't see exactly when and how.  I don't think these are the kinds of fires we "escape" from.  I cannot run away, the flames continue to burn.  I find hope in knowing that the Lord is good and sees what is best.
 "[He] will bring [me] through the fire and refine [me]... and try [me]... and [I] shall call on His name and He shall hear [me]."  How many times will I cry out from the pain?  I don't know... but He will hear me every time and I will have courage to remain in the flames... And he will "make [my] heart as gold."  I trust this and it gives me peace.

"Here then is a great truth. In the pain, the agony, and the heroic endeavors of life, we pass through a refiner’s fire, and the insignificant and the unimportant in our lives can melt away like dross and make our faith bright, intact, and strong. In this way the divine image can be mirrored from the soul. It is part of the purging toll exacted of some to become acquainted with God. In the agonies of life, we seem to listen better to the faint, godly whisperings of the Divine Shepherd.

Into every life there come the painful, despairing days of adversity and buffeting. There seems to be a full measure of anguish, sorrow, and often heartbreak for everyone, including those who earnestly seek to do right and be faithful. The thorns that prick, that stick in the flesh, that hurt, often change lives which seem robbed of significance and hope. This change comes about through a refining process which often seems cruel and hard. In this way the soul can become like soft clay in the hands of the Master in building lives of faith, usefulness, beauty, and strength. For some, the refiner’s fire causes a loss of belief and faith in God, but those with eternal perspective understand that such refining is part of the perfection process.

In our extremities, it is possible to become born again, born anew, renewed in heart and spirit. We no longer ride with the flow of the crowd, but instead we enjoy the promise of Isaiah to be renewed in our strength and “mount up with wings as eagles” (Isa. 40:31).

The proving of one’s faith goes before the witnessing, for Moroni testified, “Ye receive no witness until after the trial of your faith” (Ether 12:6). This trial of faith can become a priceless experience. Stated Peter, “That the trial of your faith, being much more precious than of gold that perisheth, though it be tried with fire, might be found unto praise and honour and glory at the appearing of Jesus Christ” (1 Pet. 1:7). Trials and adversity can be preparatory to becoming born anew.

A rebirth out of spiritual adversity causes us to become new creatures. From the book of Mosiah we learn that all mankind must be born again—born of God, changed, redeemed, and uplifted—to become the sons and daughters of God. (See Mosiah 27:24–27.)""  - James E. Faust - April 1979 "The Refiner's Fire"

-Alicia
(Faith Through Fire)
 

Only the Beginning

My nephew, Dane, returns home from his mission in January.  I can't believe it's been two years already.  What a faithful and dedicated missionary he has been!  I am so very proud of him.  As he's approached the end, he has felt very torn.  He has expressed in his letters his desire for more time.  How can it be over when it seems as if he's only just begun? There is still so much to learn, so much more to be done.

As I've pondered about this bitter-sweet moment for my nephew and the closing of his mission, I can't help but parallel it to our lives here on earth, how fast the years will go and how soon we will be called home.  Even if it isn't until we are ninety years old, will we look back at our life's mission and desire more time? What a blessing it is to know that it will not be the end, that we will go on learning, that we will continue to grow and that the sweet associations we enjoy here will be even sweeter, more beautiful, and far brighter in heaven.

Thank goodness that in the big picture, death is not the end.  We will continue on.

"One school is finished, and the time has come for another to begin." - Richard Bach, Jonathan Livingston Seagull

Victor Hugo observed,
"The nearer I approach the end, the plainer I hear around me the immortal symphonies of the worlds which invite me. . . . For half a century I have been writing my thoughts in prose and verse; history. . . . I have tried all. But I feel I have not said a thousandth part of what is in me. When I go down to the grave, I can say, like so many others, 'I have finished my day’s work,' but I can not say, 'I have finished my life.' My day’s work will begin again the next morning. The tomb is not a blind alley; it is a thoroughfare. . . . My work is only beginning." 

-Alicia

To God Alone

I woke up this morning with this song in my head.  It's officially the Christmas season.  And well, this isn't exactly a song written for Christmas but I think it should be...

Because, the true magic of Christmas is found when we lose ourselves, when we forget about what we want and think instead of how we can give.  Something incredible occurs when we focus on the beauty and good all around us and recognize God's hand.  The magic and glory of Christmas is when we have our eyes opened and our hearts filled with gratitude and wonder for the miracles that are constantly occurring.  Our souls feel lighter and we hunger for so little because we see that we already have so much.  The greatest and most valuable gift to all of mankind has already been given in the most humble way.  Everything we have ever needed is found in and through our Savior and His Priesthood authority.  We don't care about popularity, praise, position, or power.... Our cup runneth over when we kneel at His feet and worship Him, the only One worthy of such things.  This is the attitude that allows peace to enter into our hearts and fill us with good will and sincere love for our fellowmen.

Why wait for the Christmas season?
I believe in Christmas all year and every day of our lives.

"And suddenly there was with the angel a multitude of the heavenly host praising God, and saying, Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace, good will toward men." - Luke 2:13-14

"To God Alone"

by, Aaron Shust

Can You take me by the hand?

Can You use me as I am?

Break me into who You want me to be

When the time is finally right

Will You open up my eyes

And show me everything You want me to see?

This life is not my own

To God alone be the glory

To God alone be the praise

Everything I say and do

Let it be all for You

The glory is Yours alone

Yours alone

Take the offering I bring

You want more than what I sing

Can I give You every part of me?

Turn these pennies into gold

Take this life I call my own

Until I'm running after Your heart

I'm needing to let go

To God alone be the glory

To God alone be the praise

Everything I say and do

Let it be all for You

The glory is Yours alone

We will rise and we will fall

But You remain after all

You're glorious and beautiful

You're beautiful

To God alone be the glory

To God alone be the praise

Everything I say and do

Let it be all for You

The glory is Yours alone

The glory is Yours alone

Yours alone

Yours alone

-Alicia

My Old Friend

Photo taken Jan. 5, 2015

Yesterday, I spent the late afternoon with my 86-yr-old friend, Louis Crandall.  I took my youngest daughter with me for the visit.  She adores him.  Any time she peers out our living room window and sees Lou on his morning walk, she stops whatever she's doing to run out and greet him with an enormous hug.

One day as he was walking by, we both ran out to him.  Lou stopped in his tracks and acted as if he hadn't seen me in years, "I was just looking up at your window and wondering what you might be doing right now... and here you are!!" I hugged him and replied, "Well, I was just thinking how I needed something to cheer me up and there you were."

Honestly though, if ever I am down or feeling discouraged about anything, I love to visit my dear friend.  I remember one time this last January or February I got a horrible hack-job for a hair cut.  I was so embarrassed.  I wanted to get my mind off how unattractive I felt.  I decided to make a treat  for Lou and pay him a visit.  Surely, he would make me feel better.  He was grateful to see me and noticed my butchered new doo.  (I may have drawn attention to it by the insecure way I kept waving my hands near my head and apologizing for my appearance.)  Bless his pace-maker heart, he offered to buy me a wig!  He was so sincere. It made me feel better in a way that I hadn't expected.  Here this sweet man practically begged as he tried to console me, insisting he would get me a wig as soon as the next day.  I couldn't help but laugh out loud.  The manner of his consolation was absolutely hilarious and took me completely off guard  - like someone trying to comfort a huge fat woman by begging to buy her a beautiful moo moo.  I gratefully refused his offer and told him I'd stick with beanies and bandanas for a while.  Even typing this makes me smile.  That was a moment definitely worth holding in my memory.

Yesterday, we visited for nearly two hours.  I recalled the talks in Sacrament Meeting about gratitude.  This is why I love being around Lou...  If there was ever a man who personified such a virtue, it's him.  He always seems to find the good in every situation, even though he's had so many struggles.  He lost his wife when he was 69 yrs. old.  He remarried and lost his second wife 3 years ago. All of which I know has brought him enormous heartache but he never mentions it.   When he speaks of his life, his wife, his children, and grandchildren, he always does so with soulful appreciation.  I know he gets very lonely and I know his back and feet are in constant pain and yet every other word that comes out of his mouth is "thank you" and "wonderful."  How can one not be inspired by such a person?

-Alicia

The Purest Love

"The gospel of Jesus Christ is a gospel of transformation. It takes us as men and women of the earth and refines us into men and women for the eternities." - Joseph B. Wirthlin

I loved President Monson's opening message in this recent General Conference of how we "Let our light shine." It broke my heart to see him so physically weak, laboring in breath, and barely able to stand near the end of his testimony. But he was determined to deliver the sermon the Lord had inspired him to share - This made it even more powerful to me! I wanted to jump through the screen, quickly run to his side and hold him up. Oh how I love our dear prophet! And what a more perfect benadictary talk than that given by Elder Bednar as he testified of the wisdom and clarity that rests upon the First Presidency and the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles. Tears of deep gratitude streamed down my face as Elder Bednar highlighted teachings from these wonderful men I love!!! The Church is true, we are led by Apostles and Prophets who have been called of God by priesthood authority. I know this! What a blessing it has been to me throughout my life!

Many of my friends mentioned having the same feelings I did as the Prophet spoke, the feeling of wanting to run to President Monson and help hold him up.  This sheds greater light on what it means to sustain those who lead and direct this Church.

I also enjoyed what Elder Holland said about "bearing one another's burdens" and how both he and Elder Renlund tied the pure love of Christ and the love of a mother so intimately .  It seems so obvious but I had never put the two together.  It makes sense.  

"Today I declare from this pulpit what has been said here before: that no love in mortality comes closer to approximating the pure love of Jesus Christ than the selfless love a devoted mother has for her child." - Elder Jeffrey R. Holland

"In the Church, to effectively serve others we must see them through a parent’s eyes, through Heavenly Father’s eyes. Only then can we begin to comprehend the true worth of a soul. Only then can we sense the love that Heavenly Father has for all of His children. Only then can we sense the Savior’s caring concern for them. We cannot completely fulfill our covenant obligation to mourn with those who mourn and comfort those who stand in need of comfort unless we see them through God’s eyes."- Elder Dale G. Renlund

"Bear, borne, carry, deliver. These are powerful, heartening messianic words. They convey help and hope for safe movement from where we are to where we need to be—but cannot get without assistance. These words also connote burden, struggle, and fatigue—words most appropriate in describing the mission of Him who, at unspeakable cost, lifts us up when we have fallen, carries us forward when strength is gone, delivers us safely home when safety seems far beyond our reach. ...

...As Jesus said to John while in the very act of Atonement, so He says to us all, “Behold thy mother!”- Elder Jeffrey R. Holland

I remember when Elder Wirthlin was trembling and weak. President Russell M. Nelson stood behind him to steady him. This touched my heart so deeply. This is what the Gospel is truly about, the purest love that deepens our desire to help carry and sustain our brother or sister.

He Ain't Heavy He's My Brother

"True love lasts forever. It is eternally patient and forgiving. It believes, hopes, and endures all things. That is the love our Heavenly Father bears for us...

... His love is such that even should we give up on ourselves, He never will.

We see ourselves in terms of yesterday and today. Our Heavenly Father sees us in terms of forever. Although we might settle for less, Heavenly Father won’t, for He sees us as the glorious beings we are capable of becoming.

The gospel of Jesus Christ is a gospel of transformation. It takes us as men and women of the earth and refines us into men and women for the eternities.

The means of this refinement is our Christlike love. There is no pain it cannot soften, no bitterness it cannot remove, no hatred it cannot alter. The Greek playwright Sophocles wrote: 'One word frees us of all the weight and pain of life: That word is love.'" - Joseph B. Wirthlin

- Alicia

The Vain Things of This World

A young women shared on Facebook the other day that she had just finished writing in her eighth journal.  It inspired me to be more diligent with my own writing. I wish with all my heart that I could say I recorded as much as she did when I was in high school.  (Honestly though, the stuff I wrote at that age is pretty embarrassing to say the least... so maybe it's for the better.) ;)

After I was married, I kept more of a consistent record.   The other night out of curiosity, I pulled a couple of my old journals off the shelf and spent an hour reading.  I feel grateful for what I have written but still wish I had recorded more .  While flipping through the pages, I stumbled across this entry about a dream I had in July of 2009.  It caught my eye because I've been thinking a lot about dreams lately and how they work in our lives.  I've only had a handful of them through the years that have left a deep enough impression on me to capture them with my journal or retell them.  I'm so thankful I wrote this one down because I forgot all about it.

I've been thinking about the interpretation of this one all day.  I believe there's a powerful lesson to be learned from it and I take it like a warning to me as a daughter of Zion, just as the scripture found in Isaiah 3:16-24 proclaims.

...........

7-13-2009
I had a strange dream last night.  I was looking around at a yard sale and found a old-fashioned vanity.  It was slightly taller than me, with cabinet doors that opened to a large mirror on the inside.  Make-up and perfume stacked in painted fancy bottles were arranged on the shelves and in the drawers. I gazed into the mirror at my reflection and to my horror watched it begin to age very rapidly and then crumble to dust.  I turned away in disbelief, shaking my head at what I just saw.  I looked back at my appearance in the mirror just to be certain I didn't imagine it.  Again the horrible reflection aged within seconds and then crumbled to dust.  "What is going on?!  I thought, "This vanity is evil!"  

There were other women at the yard sale.  I ran to some of them and asked if they would come and look at this and tell me if they saw the same thing.  The small crowd of women gathered around as I opened the cabinet doors to show them the mirror inside.  Sure enough, as I looked at my reflection, it crumbled again from rapid aging into dust.  
"Did you see that?! Did you see what happened to my reflection?!"  I said, pointing to the glass. 
The women standing around me answered, "No, we didn't see anything strange." They all agreed with each other, "Yeah, nothing happened, it was just a normal reflection."  
They all walked away irritated and gossiped among themselves that there was something wrong with me.  I stood there alone by the vanity and found a looking glass faced-down on the table among the perfume and bottles.  I wondered as I picked it up if it would do the same thing.  When I turned it toward me, I witnessed my image decay again.  Disgusted and utterly terrified, I threw the looking glass down on the ground like it was some sort of poisonous spider, "It's pure evil!!" I shouted.  I awoke in a panic until I realized I had only been dreaming.  I took a deep breath and tried to get back to sleep but couldn't help but think of all that happened.  I thought to myself that there must be a moral to learn from it.

As I lay there pondering, I remembered some counsel in my patriarchal blessing; 

"Now when you leave this life, you leave the vain things of this world, Alicia.  But there are many things that you won't leave - you'll take them with you and they'll become your eternal possession.  It's like storing up your treasures in heaven where moth nor rust doth decay.  You'll take all of the personality. You'll take all of the truth.  You'll take all of the knowledge.  You'll take all of the character. You'll take all of the virtue and the understanding of these sacred things and your sacred relationship with God and His Son, Jesus Christ."  

I thought about the words "leave the vain things of this world".  Vain means "hollow, pointless, no purpose."  It's interesting that it was a "vanity" in my dream.

...........

Reading this entry reminded me of a fireside I attended in college at the Salt Lake Tabernacle.  I can't remember who spoke but I remember them saying that our physical appearance, no matter who we are will reach a peak and then go downhill.  There is no investment of time or money, wardrobes, makeovers, fashion consultants, work out routines or diet, that will stop our physical bodies from deteriorating.  Yes, some things may slow the process down but eventually we will all turn to dust.  On the other hand, our spirit, the substance of who we really are doesn't have a limit of beauty.  There's no peak that it reaches before it begins to drop out.  Our soul will never grow old and actually has the potential to grow more beautiful and bright with every passing day, long after this life is over and into eternity.  It cannot be faked or worn as a mask.  It has nothing to do with appearances or the outward show.  It's all about the sincere focus of the heart.

"Lay not up for yourselves treasures upon earth, where moth and rust doth corrupt, and where thieves break through and steal:  But lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust doth corrupt, and where thieves do not break through nor steal:  For where your treasure is, there will your heart be also. The light of the body is the eye: if therefore thine eye be single, thy whole body shall be full of light." - Matthew 6:19-22

I pray the Lord will help me recognize when I am getting caught up in the vain things of this world and save me from myself.  I pray I will learn to focus more on those things that matter most and lay up treasures in heaven.

-Alicia

Child of Light

With our girls at church today, we discussed preparations for our upcoming Young Women's in Excellence night. Memories from 10 years previous came into my mind of planning for the very same thing when I was serving in another ward YW's presidency...  I couldn't help but remember this song "Child of Light." It was a song I had discovered from an album written for 2004's EFY .  We used it with our girls the following January to sing for their special program.  I'd love our young women in my ward now to sing it sometime. I think it's absolutely beautiful!  I love it because it proclaims two truths about our identity - We were made to fly and we were meant to shine!  It is woven into our spiritual DNA!  We are literal sons and daughters of God, the Father of Light.  Do we realize the power we have been endowed with? How differently would we view one another, the stranger, the outcast, the sinner and the saint... if we could always see ourselves and everyone around us through this lens of truth?

"Ye are all the children of light, and the children of the day" 

- 1 Thessalonians 5:5

"They that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint." 

- Isaiah 40:31

"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people will not feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It is not just in some of us; it is in everyone and as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give others permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others." - Marianne Williamson

I'm a believer!!
-Alicia

Child of Light

by, Mindy Gledhill

Do you ever wonder who you are

do your ever wonder as you stare into the stars

Where you began

And how you got this far

from home?

Have you ever walked along the shore

Have you ever seen the water dancing back and forth

Did you look inside

To see if there was more to life

There's a dream taking wing

There's a voice that wants to sing

Even in the deepest darkest night

The Torch is raised to the sky

There are hands that hold it high

You were born to keep it burning bright

You were made to fly you were meant to shine

Child of light

You will never ever stand alone

You were never called to bare your burdens on your own

Where there's fear

Love will take control

And lead you on

There's a dream taking wing

There's a voice that wants to sing

Even in the deepest darkest night

The Torch is raised to the sky

There are hands that hold it high

You were born to keep it burning bright

You were made to fly you were meant to shine

Child of light

A Greater Measure of the Spirit

I wrote this post almost a week ago but didn't publish it... It has just been sitting on the side as a draft and I almost forgot I had written it until I was reminded about these principles in my religion class today.  How desperately do we want the Spirit to guide us in our lives?  I love the intent and desire in the hearts of the disciples in 3 Nephi 19.  If you could ask God for anything, what would it be?  These men desired most of all to have the Holy Ghost.  (3 Nephi 19:9)  How is this obtained?  How can we know we are being guided by the Spirit?

When you scan through this chapter, the word "pray" is mentioned twenty-eight times.  It's found in 22 of the 36 verses and if you include the verses that are referencing prayer but don't necessarily say the word, then it is found in 26 of the 36 verses.  I love discoveries like this!

 When the resurrected Lord ministered unto the ancient inhabitants of this land, He gave the sermon on the mount, He administered the sacrament more than once, many were baptized, and He taught and exemplified a very clear pattern of prayer.

The Lord calls twelve disciples who are baptized in His name and they are blessed with the power of His Spirit (3 Ne.19:4,9-13). As they kneel to pray, the Savior's "countenance did smile upon them, and the light of His countenance did shine upon them" (3 Nephi 19:25).  Now this is so cool because something happened to the disciples as they were praying...  They began to shine! "behold, they were as white as the countenance and also the garments of Jesus."
The Savior recognized this and thanks the Father in prayer saying, "I thank thee that thou hast purified those who I have chosen, because of their faith." (19:28)  They were shining because they were purified!

Let's look at that word "purified."
Purified = free from anything that debases, pollutes, cheapens, or contaminates.
sanctified, made holy, set apart, consecrated.

This is what they desired with all of their souls.  This is what they plead and prayed for! (19:24)
Do we desire this too?  How do we obtain it?  Christ says we can.  He says that as we hearken and believe on the words of these twelve we will also be purified, "Father, I thank thee that thou hast purified those whom I have chosen, because of their faith, and I pray for them, and also for them who shall believe on their words, that they may be purified in me, through faith on their words, even as they are purified in me."(19:28)

This solidifies to me the necessity to be aligned with the Bretheren! They are true messengers.

Can you imagine what that must have been like to witness, to be in the presence of, to see with our own eyes and hear with our own ears, prayers offered by the Savior Himself and His twelve disciples?!  "And the mulitude did hear and do bear record; and their hearts were open and they did understand in their hearts the words which He prayed... so great and marvelous were the words which He prayed that they cannot be written, neither can they be uttered by man." (19:33,34)

After this chapter the Savior administers the sacrament again.  Christ has declared that He is the "Bread of life" (John 6:35)  He gives this bread to the twelve and "when they had eaten He commanded them that they should break bread, and give unto the multitude." And He does the same with the wine. (3 Nephi 20:4-7)

This is significant because the sacrament has everything to do with sanctification and purification.  If we listen to the words of the prayer, we learn that this renewal of our covenants, this re-committing ourselves, opens us to refinement, that we may "always have His spirit" to be with us. (Moroni 4:3 5:2)

Prayer is a powerful, powerful tool.  It is an expression of faith!
I believe that the everyday prayers, morning and night, and the heart-felt ones in-between, all throughout our week, help to prepare us for the sacred ordinance of the the sacrament on the Sabbath.  I believe that when our desire is the the same as those twelve disciples, our hearts will be receptive.  We will hunger and thirst for His spirit to always be with us, we will be open to the words of the disciples He has chosen.  Their teachings will become our daily bread, they will become part of our very being, and we will be filled!

- Alicia

Let's just call her a ghost cat.

President Dieter F. Uchtdorf said: “Over the course of my life, I have had the opportunity to rub shoulders with some of the most competent and intelligent men and women this world has to offer. When I was younger, I was impressed by those who were educated, accomplished, successful, and applauded by the world. But over the years, I have come to the realization that I am far more impressed by those wonderful and blessed souls who are truly good and without guile.”

My best friend was called to be the new Young Women's President a few months ago.  The morning she was called she was asked to speak a few words to the congregation.  As she stood, I saw a powerful woman, a spiritual giant who has been an incredible example to me. I couldn't help but cry tears of joy!  She is as President Uchtdorf describes as one of those "wonderful and blessed souls who [is] truly good and without guile."

Later that afternoon, as the young women trickled into the classroom and before the new presidency arrived, one of the girls said with sort of a sigh, "I'm not happy about this change.  I don't know her."
I imediately responded with excitement, "Oh, don't you worry, as you get to know her, you will LOVE her, absolutely love her!"  Then I asked if she had seen the recent movie with Ben Stiller, "The Secret Life of Walter Mitty."
"Yes."
"Well, you remember how the photographer, Sean O'connell, is at the top of a mountain trying to get a photograph of the snow leopard, or 'ghost cat.' He tells Walter that his discovery is a big deal because 'ghost cats' are extremely difficult to find, they don't show themselves to people or try to make themselves known... and then there's that awesome line...
Beautiful things don't ask for attention."
"Yeah, I remember that part of the movie," the young woman answered.
"Well that's how Sister Nimer is.  She is one of the most amazing, most thoughtful, most giving friends I have ever had and yet she would never assume that."

How beautiful is a person who is genuine, who never needs to boast who never needs to draw attention to themselves!  They are content quietly fulfilling their responsibilities.  They do so honorably often giving credit to others and are constantly grateful to God.  This rare beauty isn't found in fashion magazines, or re-pinned on pintrest.  It can't be bought or sold.  It's not paraded or pretended.  It comes from purity of heart, from real intent, and deep humility.

"In a world where praise, position, power, accolades, and authority are sought on every side, I honor those wonderful and blessed souls who are truly good and without guile, those who are motivated by a love of God and their neighbors, those great women and men who are 'more anxious to serve than to have dominion.'" - Elder Michael T. Ringwood

 - Alicia