Throw-back Thursday - Word Choice

I wrote this poem about controlling our words nine years ago... before I had a teenage son who likes to test me to the very max and has a tongue that can talk anyone into circles.  How he does it? I do not know.  Sometimes, I get discouraged because I honestly have no clue how to change certain frustrating behaviors in any of my children.  As a parent, it's hard not to feel the blame when they are terribly mean to each other or behave inappropriately--for there must have been some teaching moment I missed, some consequence I never followed through with to cause them to think such behavior is okay.

For me, the tongue is the hardest thing to control, especially as a mother.  I'm guilty of saying things I swore I'd never say to my kids like, "What's the matter with you?" "This is lazy work." "Stop being such a jerk to her." "If you go out like that, you'll look like a slob."  (Before I embarrass myself much more, you get the idea.)  It's just not the kind of language I'm proud of.  It's hurtful and it never helps the situation. Being a mom is extremely humbling because I'm pretty good at talking the talk but there are just some areas I really need to walk the walk.

Even though I'm not perfect at this, I still believe the words in my old poem are absolutely true. Pray for charity and then...  Practice. Practice. Practice.... and practice some more.

Compared to the ship itself,

The helm is rather small;

But it’s the helm that turns the ship

And guides it though it all:

So this is with our tongue,

This tiny little member-

Can blaze destruction like a fire

From the smallest of an ember.

If one gives a blessing,

And then they turn to curse another:

Sings praises to our God above

But loathes and hates his brother…

Which master do they follow?

What are the seeds then sown?

Discern the works of righteousness,

By their fruits they shall be known.

If something does not edify

And encourage greater love,

How can it truly be of God-

Or claim wisdom from above?

If I preach great words of knowledge

And have the gift of prophecy

My words become as sounding brass

If I am void of charity.

Let us then control our tongues

Of speaking ill of others,

And rid our hearts of prejudice

Or fighting with our brothers.

Let us follow Jesus Christ.

Let us pray for charity-

Pray for strength over the flesh

And walk more peaceably.

Through His grace may we strive

To focus on the good

And never tear another down

Let us do as Jesus would.

-Alicia Rawlins 2007

(Luke 5:44. John 13:34, 35. 1 Corinthians 2:9-14. 1 Corinthians 13:1-4. Galatians 5:16-26. Ephesians 4:29. James 3:3-17.)

"Exuberance" is a good word - Ponderize - Week 55

She turned to Miriam with an overly enthusiastic handshake and a sing-songy voice, "Hi!! My name is Elise!! I'm so happy you're here!! I'm going to be your very best friend!!"
Miriam wasn't interested in best friends or any friends for that matter.  She was upset that she had to go to a new ward in the first place and struggled to understand why we had to attend a completely different building when it really wasn't much further away than the chapel near our old place.
She gave Elise a half-smile and responded flatly, "Thanks."

After church, Miriam complained, "There's only two girls in Young Women's and the one that's my age is way too hyper."  She told me all about the chatty blond bubbly girl who flung herself into her personal space.
"Aren't you glad she was nice to you though?" I asked.
"Well... yeah, I guess so." She muttered quitely.
I continued, "Imagine walking into Young Women's and this girl was the type who was snarky and snobbish. Don't you think that would have been much more difficult to deal with?"
Miriam thought for a moment, "You're right.  I'm glad she was friendly.  I just think she needs to tone it down a bit."
I laughed understandingly, "Well, I bet she's super excited because she finally gets to have another girl her age in class.  I wonder how long it has been that they've only had two Young Women? Wouldn't you be happy?"

Yesterday was our second Sunday.  We sat in the row right behind Miriam's "new best friend"--she was holding her toddler sister, bouncing and playing with her in her lap. As soon as she saw Miriam out of the corner of her eye, she flipped around and extended her hand, "Hi again, it's so great to see you!" She said something about it being a beautiful day and then went back to playing with her sister.
Miriam leaned over to me and whispered, "That's her."
I guessed as much and whispered back, "I like her!"
She smiled warmly and I could tell that she was beginning to like her too.

After church, we gathered everyone in the van, "Where's Miriam?" I asked. Joseph pointed across the parking lot to Miriam and Elise, "They're walking home together. I guess all the youth from this ward walk home together. At least that's what one of the other parents was telling me."
"Really?" I thought, "That's so cool!"
Chandler watched as we began to drive by the group of youth, "let me out," he said.  He opened the side door of the van and ran to all the kids.  They didn't flinch and just let him mix right in.  It was so awesome to see! What a blessing!

I've been reading the Isaiah chapters in the Book of Mormon for my personal scripture study and as I read one of the verses, I couldn't help but think of Miriam's happy friend and how grateful I was that she wasn't stuck-up or arrogant in any way.  I really think that would have made our move much too difficult for her.

"And it shall come to pass that the lofty looks of man shall be humbled, and the haughtiness of men shall be bowed down, and the Lord alone shall be exalted in that day... The high ones of stature shall be hewn down; and the haughty shall be humbled... But with righteousness shall he judge the poor, and reprove with equity for the meek of the earth..." Isaiah 2:11, 10:33, 11:4

The verse I'm pondering for the week is The Message version of Galatians 5:22-23
 "But what happens when we live God’s way? He brings gifts into our lives, much the same way that fruit appears in an orchard—things like affection for others, exuberance about life, serenity. We develop a willingness to stick with things, a sense of compassion in the heart, and a conviction that a basic holiness permeates things and people. We find ourselves involved in loyal commitments, not needing to force our way in life, able to marshal and direct our energies wisely."

-Alicia

Be Thou Humble - By, Elder Steven E. Snow

Pure Religion

This last April, when we heard all the conference talks about refugees.... we prayed to know how to help and the answer came very clear to my husband and me, "Become Foster Parents." We've done respite care a number of times these past few months and we just moved into our new home over the weekend and are getting it foster-ready.  Every time I hear these stories of refugees, I cannot help but think of these children who have been displaced in foster care and how we are here to give them hope and do all we can to make it so they can return to their families and loved ones again. 

Watch and pray to know how to help--then make a move.  There are so many in need and there is something for all of us to do.  We quickly forget the troubles of our own hearts as we reach out in compassion to help others. Our purpose in this life is to learn pure love, pure religion undefiled... This is where real freedom is found.  

-Alicia

Refuge From the Storm

Outside Ourselves

In the first part of the Book of Mormon we meet Nephi and his family.  We witness them go through some pretty dramatic changes under some rather intense circumstances.  Tensions are high, moral is low, and at one time or another someone in the family is found complaining or murmuring.

Now, when I imagine myself in the kinds of situations Nephi had to struggle through, I can see how easily it would have been to rattle off in frustration or shake my fist at heaven.  Thankfully, my life has no where near the complications he faced and by comparison, things for me are quite cushy. Even still, I sometimes lose sight of the good things around me and the blessings I have.

Because of what I've been reading in my personal scripture study, I've been thinking more about this human nature default we have to complain or become self-centered. It's also on my mind because in my writing class I'm in the middle of a rhetorical analysis on a commencement speech that focuses on this same topic.

I remember hearing something about this speech last year in my Anthropology class and was fascinated with it then.

The speaker, David Wallace, describes a type of freedom that comes from choosing to be aware of our surroundings, to step outside of our "tiny skull-sized kingdom" and assume the best in others, and realize that everything doesn't revolve around us. He refers to the old cliche', "The mind is a wonderful servant but a terrible master".

The monologues we choose to entertain inside our head each day will either corner us with thick prison walls of isolation, bitterness, and depression or free our souls from the dark cells of self into a beautiful world of conciseness: a deliberate awareness of others. As we choose to entertain thoughts that inspire compassion, understanding, and love we can make almost every situation bearable and even sacred.

I'd recommend listening to the full 20min speech here. But if you want a short summarized version, there's also this.  I think it's brilliant!!

What will we choose today?
-Alicia

Hope, Love of God, and Love of Others - Ponderize - Week 52

We watched the Presidential Debate tonight as a family.  I don't favor either side and to be honest, I don't really like the two party system--I really don't think our founding fathers meant for us to have only two parties.

Anyway, something about watching this tonight gave me the same sinking feeling as I did watching the live coverage of the attacks on 9/11--It left my spirit feeling exhausted and sore. Name-calling, speaking over each other, and interrupting, are such terrible and useless ways of communication--it's not only ugly and immature but it spreads anger and hatred like a blazing wild fire.

The moderator asks both candidates what the biggest issue is facing America.  If you were to ask me what it is, I would NOT say it's economic, international relationships, equal rights, or any of the main things we hear.  I would say that our biggest threat to our nation is the incivility, increased meanness, and unrepentant contention being displayed on the internet, social media, in our schools, and in our streets.

Elder Oaks said the following at a convention last year, " We all lose when an atmosphere of anger or hostility or contention prevails,” he said.  “We all lose when we cannot debate public policies without resorting to boycotts, firings, and intimidation of our adversaries.”

I keep thinking of Avenger's Civil War and how the enemy's plan was to destroy the Avengers by tearing them apart from the inside-out, to turn good people on each other, and just let them destroy themselves. I feel like that's what is going to happen to us as Americans if we do not watch ourselves.

Right after the presidential arguing was over, we had a short Family Home Evening lesson in preparation for this weekend where we'll get to listen to Prophets and Apostles of God speak.  It was such a nice contrast to turn off the debate and redirect our conversation towards the things we loved from last General Conference and what we are looking forward to with this one.  There was an immediate difference in the atmosphere as we focused on true doctrine.

I'm grateful for the message Elder Oaks gave at BYU a few weeks ago entitled, Elections, Hope and Freedom.  I've listened to his talk several times now.  This next portion is what I feel like focusing on for my scripture to ponder this week.

"In the distressing circumstances that surround us, we must trust in God and His promises, and hold fast to the vital gospel teaching of hope.  The prophet, Nephi, taught that we must "press forward with a steadfastness in Christ, having a perfect brightness of hope, and a love of God, and of all men"(*)... Hope is a characteristic Christian virtue;  I am glad to practice it and to recommend it to counter all current despair.  Hope based on trust in the Lord and His promises has sustained me through all the circumstances of my life." - Elder Dallin H. Oaks


-Alicia

Oh, Thank Heaven - Ponderize - Week 39

Yesterday, my husband and I rode his motorcycle to attend a family meeting with my father-in-law and all the adults.  When we arrived, it took a moment to adjust because my entire face and arms were numb from flapping in the wind at 80 mph for an entire hour. That's the furthest I've ever ridden with him.  

I love that my father-in-law does these meetings a couple times a year, that he recognizes his stewardship continues in many ways even though his children are grown.  At these meetings, he shares insights and lessons, gives counsel/ warnings, and bears testimony of the power of the Priesthood in our lives (both men and women).  Last night, he bore testimony of the ability we have to call on the powers of heaven, that God hears our prayers, and that no matter the difficulties we face in the future we can count on a sure knowledge that by faith, miracles happen!

After the meeting was over, we visited with one another for almost another two hours.  A couple of times, I looked around the room and was filled with gratitude for such an amazing family.  How I love these people!  I had a great conversation with my niece, Morgan.  She's back home after being away at college for a few years and it was so awesome to see how much she's matured.  She's just one of the adults now.

We left my father-in-law's home around 10:30.  I hopped on the bike with Joseph and before we entered the freeway I noticed the 7-11 sign, "Oh thank heaven!"
"Yeah" I thought.  I began to list the incredible blessings in my life:
The blessing of having an abundance of everything I need to stay alive.
The blessing of having four outstanding, creative, talented, beautiful, fun, and big-hearted children.
The blessing of holding on to my husband and knowing that we can get through anything together.
The blessing of knowing without any doubt that God is real, that He loves me, that He knows me, that He hears my every prayer, every longing, every desire of my heart, and that He's working things out in His timing for my good.
The blessing of knowing that no matter what happens in life, no matter the difficulties we might face now or in the future, we can call down heaven, and it will be alright.
My eyes began to fill with tears as my mind flooded with thoughts of every blessing, big and small, even the ones that have come through heartache and sorrow. I looked up at the stars and whispered a grateful "Thank You."

Riding late at night on the interstate at 80 mph with helmets as our only protective gear, caused my mind to drift to a few other thoughts.  "What if something went wrong right now? What if we hit a break in the road or had to suddenly dodge some debris? What if something happened that took both our lives right this very moment?  How exposed we are!  How vulnerable we are in this current situation!"  I held tightly to my husband's waist, the opposing force of the wind almost made my neck tired.  But I felt an awesome sensation.  I felt complete peace and totally calm! "What if it were my time, right now?" Without hesitation my whole soul answered, "I'd thank God for everything. What a ride it has been!"  I closed my eyes and the rushing speed of wind pulling on my body no longer felt like opposition but like a thousand angels surrounding me, enveloping me in a cloak of heavenly power and glory.

This morning, I read the verse where King Benjamin exhorts his people in Mosiah 2:19, "If I who ye call your king, who has spent his days in your service, and yet has been in the service of God, do merit any thanks from you, O how you ought to thank your heavenly King!" I thought of my experience on the motorcycle last night and the sensation of being embraced by a thousand angels.  I cross-referenced to several verses about gratitude and found a song that David wrote in Psalms 34:1-4.

You gotta love David, this is a guy who knows how to speak my language. :)

"I will bless the Lord at all times: 

His praise shall continually be in my mouth.

My soul shall make her boast in the Lord: 

The humble shall hear thereof, and be glad.

O magnify the Lord with me, 

and let us exalt his name together.

I sought the Lord, and he heard me, 

and delivered me from all my fears."

-Alicia

Beauty Divine

"I looked and beheld a tree... and the beauty thereof was far beyond, 

yea, exceeding of all beauty."

(1 Nephi 11:8)

Breathtaking vision, It's a sight to behold,

Something about it that never grows old.

Its brilliance is timeless and shines like the Son-

Bright as the day heav'n and earth become one.

Age will not tarnish purest beauty Divine

Each passing year only ripen, refine

Growing in majesty and flourishing grace,

Kindness, compassion, a smiling face,

Inspiring virtue, fine-tuned affection

Hope, friendship, joy, and human connection.
A new Spirit within from heaven above
Constantly reaching with a Christlike love,

Everlasting beauty that conquers the grave

Lives on in the soul and all that they gave.

by, Alicia Rawlins

Tree of Life by, Audiomachine

“I believe the Savior is telling us that unless we lose ourselves in service to others, there is little purpose to our own lives. Those who live only for themselves eventually shrivel up and … lose their lives, while those who lose themselves in service to others grow and flourish—and in effect save their lives.” - President Thomas S. Monson

"I have come to know that it is the love of God and neighbor that gives meaning to life. May we follow our Savior’s example and His admonition to reach out to others with love." - Cheryl A. Esplin

"There is no happiness in having or in getting, but only in giving." - Henry Drummond

"You will find as you look back upon your life that the moments when you have truly lived are the moments when you have done things in the spirit of love." - Henry Drummond

Happy Sabbath!

"We strive to build an environment in our home and in our hearts 
where the Spirit of God may dwell."

- Rawlins Family Mission Statement

I look forward to Sundays!  I especially love the atmosphere of our home when we have hymns or conference talks playing.  My husband and I have playlists we've created to enrich our Sundays... and every day for that matter.  Last night my husband shared with me a song from his compilation,  "Nearer My God to Thee"  I love a-capella groups and men's choirs... Plus, this is one of my favorite hymns; so, a combination of these things was a real treat to listen to.  

What do you do to draw nearer to God on the Sabbath?

What sort of things invite the Spirit and help you desire greater commitment to the covenants you've made?

Moroni has some great verses that help us to keep our Sundays conducted after the manner of the Spirit:

• The Sacrament was administered "according to the commandments of Christ" "They [the elder or priest] did kneel down with the church, and pray to the Father in the name of Christ." (Moroni 4:1,2)

• "They came forth with a broken heart and a contrite spirit, and witnessed unto the church that they truly repented of all their sins." (Moroni 6:2)

• "They took upon them the name of Christ, having a determination to serve Him to the end." (Moroni 6:3)

• "They were numbered among the people of the church of Christ; and their names were taken, that they might be remembered and nourished by the good word of God, to keep them in the right way..." (Moroni 6:4)

• "The church did meet together oft, to fast and to pray and to speak one with another concerning the welfare of their souls.  And they did meet together oft to partake of [the sacrament], in remembrance of the Lord Jesus." (Moroni 6:5,6)

• "They were strict to observe... As oft as they repented and sought forgiveness, with real intent, they were forgiven... And their meetings were conducted by the church after the manner of the workings of the Spirit, and by the power of the Holy Ghost." (Moroni 6:8)

• "The power of the Holy Ghost led them whether to preach, or to exhort, or to pray, or to supplicate, or to sing" (Moroni 6:9)

The Sabbath is a day of rest and I’ve discovered that I find rest when  I am centered on the Savior (which can actually mean hard work, very hard work)  But the rest is real: it is comforting,  It is spiritual, it is encouraging, it is hopeful - always hopeful because it is found in truth, it is refreshing and rejuvenating.

Like Moroni, I find rest when I am with others whose focus is the same as we “meet together often to fast and to pray” and conduct our lives “after the manner of the Spirit”.  It makes my day and my week so much brighter and it nourishes my soul. 

Maybe that’s why it’s called “Sun”day?   

-Alicia :)
My Favorite Choral Hymn Arrangements for Sunday Take a listen!

https://www.lds.org/church/news/church-leaders-call-for-better-observance-of-sabbath-day?lang=eng

Aunt Sylvia - Part 6

The following is taken from part of my Great Aunt Sylvia's book, "Victory Through Suffering."  It's her story of how she survived a Japanese Concentration Camp:

(See Previous Accounts)
Aunt Sylvia - Part 5
Aunt Sylvia - Part 4
Aunt Sylvia - Part 3
Aunt Sylvia - Part 2
Aunt Sylvia - Part 1

Walk With Me

When Saw We Thee a Stranger

Another of the Lord's blessings was that we had no light.  Since it was dark early, we retired early.  After I had Bible hour with the children, I said, "Now you tell Mother a story."
Mark said, "I can't tell you a story."
I answered, "You can't tell a story like Mother can, but you can tell it like Mark can."
Thus they learned more in telling the story than in hearing it.  By the time they were out of camp they could tell the Bible stories and their applications.  They were a help in their Sunday School class in their home church.

Continually threatened by death, made eternity real to them.  People were dying every day in camp.  I always tried to make the way of salvation very clear, letting them make their own decisions.  I never pressed for a decision or told them they were saved.  Finally, I realized they were sure of their own salvation and the importance of it.
Overhearing my conversations when I said, "the most important thing is...."
Paul often interrupted, "...to know you are saved. Then it does not matter what happens."
How true that is!  One day a lady coming back from visiting the sick asked, "What good is it to visit the sick?  They are not interested in camp conversations."
Turning to the boys, I asked them, "What would you talk to them about?"
Paul replied, "I would talk to them about Jesus.  Then if they are really saved it does not matter if they die."

Another miracle in camp was the tomato plants.  They were plants I found in a ditch while weeding the field.  They were not large, flowering plants but I trusted they would yet transplant.  I dug up the ground with a table knife.  We planted and watered with prayer.  They grew higher than my head.  We expected God to work a miracle, and He did!  The first little one we divided.  It tasted so good, as we had not eaten tomatoes for so long.

We had no medicines or hospital but only rooms set aside to keep the sick.  A dear sister in the Lord was there very ill.  She craved fruit.  About that time, we had been studying with the boys about giving to the Lord.
Mark asked, "How can we give to the Lord in this camp?"
I told him that if we gave to [others], it was as though we gave to Him,
"If ye have done it unto the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto Me."
I asked them if they would like to give a tomato to this friend, Miss DeVries.
"Oh, yes!" they chimed joyfully.

The boys were so happy as they visited her that evening.  They carried the precious tomato (a wonderful gift in those days) and offered it with radiant faces to the suffering one with these words, "We give you this in the name of the Lord."
Thus given by His little servants and graciously accepted by Miss De Vries, It was a testimony throughout the hospital room.  She said she could hardly eat such a precious gift.

Shortly after, we were again taking a tomato to Miss DeVries and I suggested to the boys that we first visit a dear mother who was dying.  I stopped to talk with her but she was too far gone to talk of eternal things.  Then I asked her if she would like a tomato.  She did not seem to hear.  However, it must have registered in her mind, for later when she rallied a bit, she asked, "Do you have a tomato?"
I told her we had one for her.  She asked to see it.  Mark brought it in to her.  She took it gratefully.  Later, the nurse prepared it for her.  It was the last thing she ate before she died.  In such ways, we were able to help a few in their last moments of suffering.

Some would come to buy tomatoes.
We could have bought almost anything with some tomatoes in those days!
I told them, "These tomatoes are the Lord's and I cannot sell them."
The camp was so large I could not share with everyone.
I asked the Lord to lead me where it would be a testimony, especially to the household of faith.  Others who had tomatoes found they were being stolen.  Putting the responsibility on the Lord, I said, "Lord, they are Your tomatoes' for Thy glory.  If they steal, they steal from Thee."
The Lord protected them.  We never missed any of our tomatoes.  We had over 250 from these few plants and were still bearing them when we left camp.  It was such a blessing and joy to the boys to share and expect the Lord to work.  They decided to plant a little garden to be used to give the sick ones.  Each one planted, weeded and watered his own plot.  They proved the joy of sharing:  "It is more blessed to give than to receive."

-Aunt Sylvia

What is my intent?

Two of my favorite quotes by Martin Luther King are these:

 "Let no man pull you low enough to hate him."

and

“Darkness cannot drive out darkness: only light can do that. 

Hate cannot drive out hate: only love can do that.”

One of my assignments these past two days has been to read Martin Luther King's Letter from Birmingham Jail.  He was imprisoned on Good Friday, April 12, 1963.  The letter was written over the next four days and speaks volumes about this incredible man's character in the face of so much persecution and opposition.  I'm deeply impressed to see how civilly and charitably he chose his words to his oppressors.  This was a man who truly understood christian courage.  In my mind, he ranks among the "noble and great ones".

Because my scripture studies this past week focused on the final days of Christ's life and the things He taught before He was crucified, it has caused me to pay particular attention to what was happening in 1963.

The parallel is this:  The segregation laws in Birmingham were unjust for they claimed to be what was best for the community as a whole "to keep the peace" but were really enforced to justify sin.  In his letter Martin Luther King makes the distinction, "How does one determine whether a law is just or unjust? A just law is a man made code that squares with the moral law or the law of God. An unjust law is a code that is out of harmony with the moral law." Wasn't that why the Sadducees and Pharisees hated Christ?  The Savior's teachings were an open threat to their immoral way of life and exposed their hypocritical laws.  These were men who liked to boast of their great knowledge of scripture, they stood on the street corners teaching in a form of righteousness to "appear holy" with the intent to obtain monetary, religious, or social acceptance yet inside, they were "full of dead men's bones".

Martin Luther King wrote, "I have tried to make clear that it is wrong to use immoral means to attain moral ends.  But now I must affirm that it is just as wrong, or perhaps even more so to use moral means [obedience to law] to preserve immoral ends... As T.S. Eliot has said: 'The last temptation is the greatest treason: To do the right deed for the wrong reason.'"

This is a penetrating statement, a compelling thought, that causes me to evaluate my own deeds.  I have to ask as myself in every action or re-action, "What is my intent?"  One of the steps in Dr. King's campaign was "self-purification."  This is the same call our Savior gives us, to first "cleanse the inner vessel."

There is so much to think about.  All that I give, all that I share, all that I say, and all that I do will be fruitless, meaningless, and hollow if my intentions are not in the right place and if I don't maintain a spirit of love for my enemies.

I'm grateful for inspired writings of truth wherever they are found, writings that cause me to reflect, to have a change of perspective, and invite me to evaluate my own choices... for I have so much to learn. :)

-Alicia

Love Isn't Blind

It seems to me that the trends of the world often follow the pattern of what I call "shallow love."  So many relationships leave no room for imperfection in one another and therefore leave no room for growth.  When the going gets tough or if anything dissatisfies... they abandon everything.

C.S. Lewis observed this about Gods love and maybe we can apply something of this pattern in our own lives with everyone we come in contact with:

"To see in some measure, like God.  His love and His knowledge are not distinct from one another, nor from Him.  We could almost say He sees because He loves, and therefore loves although He sees." 

 "He loves although He sees."  Think about it for a moment! "He loves although He sees."  I believe that is what endears us to the Savior's heart.  That is the quality that makes us comfortable to fall before Him as our imperfect selves.  There is no piece of us that is hidden, He sees the good, the bad, and the ugly in our souls... and yet He loves us still.  

In this Shakespeare Sonnet, observe how he describes love.  It is unchanging even when it finds reason to change and sees the infinite worth even when the person may not "measure up" to it. 

Let me not to the marriage of true minds

Admit impediments. Love is not love

Which alters when it alteration finds,

Or bends with the remover to remove:

O no; it is an ever-fixed mark,

That looks on tempests, and is never shaken;

It is the star to every wandering bark,

Whose worth's unknown, although his height be taken.

Love's not Time's fool, though rosy lips and cheeks

Within his bending sickle's compass come;

Love alters not with his brief hours and weeks,

But bears it out even to the edge of doom.

 If this be error and upon me proved,

 I never writ, nor no man ever loved. 

I really like where Shakespeare describes that true love "bears it out even to the edge of doom."  It reminds me of the verse I'm pondering this week on charity.  

After the Apostle Paul describes this wonderful virtue he warns us that we don't see the full picture and even don't understand our own hearts but the Lord does and eventually we will see clearly through Him.

“For now we see through a glass, darkly; but then face to face: now I know in part; but then shall I know even as I am known” (1 Cor. 13:12).

Pure and Christlike love always evokes and promotes feelings of unity, appreciation, and gentleness...  never discord, dissension, or hostility.  We are covenant people who have taken upon us the name of Christ and our behavior should reflect that same kind of perfect charity... to "love although [we] see."

Finally, I'll close this post with some thoughts from President Eyring in 1998

The sacramental prayer can remind us every week of how the gift of unity will come through obedience to the laws and ordinances of the gospel of Jesus Christ. When we keep our covenants to take His name upon us, to remember Him always, and to keep all His commandments, we will receive the companionship of His Spirit. That will soften our hearts and unite us. But there are two warnings which must come with that promise.

First, the Holy Ghost remains with us only if we stay clean and free from the love of the things of the world. A choice to be unclean will repel the Holy Ghost. The Spirit only dwells with those who choose the Lord over the world. “Be ye clean” (3 Ne. 20:41; D&C 38:42) and love God with all your “heart, … might, mind, and strength” (D&C 59:5) are not suggestions but commandments. And they are necessary to the companionship of the Spirit, without which we cannot be one.

The other warning is to beware of pride. A unity which comes to a family or to a people softened by the Spirit will bring great power. With that power will come recognition from the world. Whether that recognition brings praise or envy, it could lead us to pride. That would offend the Spirit. There is a protection against pride, that sure source of disunity. It is to see the bounties which God pours upon us not only as a mark of His favor but an opportunity to join with those around us in greater service. A man and his wife learn to be one by using their similarities to understand each other and their differences to complement each other in serving one another and those around them. In the same way, we can unite with those who do not accept our doctrine but share our desire to bless the children of our Heavenly Father.


We can become peacemakers, worthy to be called blessed and the children of God (see Matt. 5:9).

...........
- It's a new day. Let's seek for and choose opportunities to "see through the glass" with clarity, with the Spirit, with the eyes of Christ.

-Alicia

"Seeketh Not Her Own" - Ponderize - Week 18

So, we watched Groundhog Day tonight and then talked to the kids about what broke the cursed rut of misery for Phil Connors.  It was when he had a "mighty change of heart" and began to live for others instead of for himself. The curse was broken when he sincerely cared and tried to better himself not to impress but to bless.

With this in mind... My verse I've chosen to "ponderize" for the week is this:

"Charity suffereth long, and is kind; charity envieth not; charity vaunteth not itself, is not puffed up, Doth not behave itself unseemly, seeketh not her own, is not easily provoked, thinketh no evil; Rejoiceth not in iniquity, but rejoiceth in the truth;  Beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things." - 1 Corinthians 13:4-7

Life is beautiful! :)
-Alicia

Don't Look Back

New Year's Eve preparations were fun yesterday.  The kids and I dug through old party stuff to find some things to hang around the house.  Miriam hung streamers everywhere.  Kaylee helped blow up balloons and cut out hearts for daddy.  I gave Micah a stack of construction paper and he went giddy over making a "New Year's Party Hat." (Isn't it lovely? Here I am modeling below.)  

Chandler wasn't "in" on making the decorations.  He found this website where he can design his own football jersey's and it's been his "new obsession."  He fantasizes about initiating a Stake football team since we have church basketball.  If his wish ever comes true, he's the man for the jersey design.  Apparently, we will be called "The Provo East Stake Tigers" and will sport some stylish crimson and gold uniforms.

 Anyway, most of us continued to decorate.  I jammed out to "Don't Look Back" by, Boston a couple of times until my kids began to complain about stupid "old" music.  I informed them that it was called "classic" not old... "classic rock!!"  (Secretly, I know they loved it.  And I'm pretty sure they were awed by my air guitar solo.)  Regardless of their opinion, I still think the song was perfect for the day.  

Speaking of "Don't Look Back".... Do you remember Lot's wife?  She looked back.  

Remembering this caused me to remember "Remember Lot's Wife," a talk by Elder Holland about not looking back.  So I went back and found the talk to listen to.  It was great to remember.  ;) 

(Whew, That was fun!) 

"As a new year starts and we try to benefit from a proper view of what has gone before, I plead with you not to dwell on days now gone, nor to yearn vainly for yesterdays, however good those yesterdays may have been. The past is to be learned from but not lived in. We look back to claim the embers from glowing experiences but not the ashes. And when we have learned what we need to learn and have brought with us the best that we have experienced, then we look ahead, we remember that faith is always pointed toward the future. Faith always has to do with blessings and truths and events that will yet be efficacious in our lives."

"Perhaps at this beginning of a new year there is no greater requirement for us than to do as the Lord Himself said He does: “Behold, he who has repented of his sins, the same is forgiven, and I, the Lord, remember them no more” (D&C 58:42).

"The proviso, of course, is that repentance has to be sincere, but when it is and when honest effort is being made to progress, we are guilty of the greater sin if we keep remembering and recalling and rebashing someone with their earlier mistakes—and that “someone” might be ourselves. We can be so hard on ourselves, often much more so than with others! - Elder Jeffrey R. Holland "Remember Lot's Wife"

I gleaned two messages from this talk:

1. Live in the present with hope for the future.  Don't long to re-live the glory days of the past thus wishing away the here and now.  Count your blessings. Shape and build your life with gratitude.

2. Don't look back at other's mistakes or your own.  Let them go, let people repent.  Forgive and forget as if it never happened.  Allow Christ's atonement to work in your life. Give others and give yourself the gift of a brand new day.

Elder Holland describes such forward thinking as faith!

"Let people repent. Let people grow. Believe that people can change and improve. Is that faith? Yes! Is that hope? Yes! Is it charity? Yes! Above all, it is charity, the pure love of Christ." 

The mutual theme for this new year is "Press Forward with a Steadfastness in Christ."

"Wherefore, ye must press forward with a steadfastness in Christ, having a perfect brightness of hope, and a love of God and of all men. Wherefore, if ye shall press forward, feasting upon the word of Christ, and endure to the end, behold, thus saith the Father: Ye shall have eternal life." - 2 Nephi 31:20

I love that!  It reminds me of Joseph Smith's call for faith:

 "Shall we not go on in so great a cause? Go forward not backward. Courage, brethren; and on, on to the victory." - Joseph Smith

Let's strive for greater faith, hope, and charity this year as we keep putting one foot in front of the other, practicing each day sincere genuine gratitude and show forth an increase of love.  We have so much to be hopeful for. Don't look back.  

Good things come to those who press forward.

Happy New Year!

-Alicia  

Traditions Old and New

"If we will build righteous traditions in our families, the light of the gospel can grow ever brighter in the lives of our children from generation to generation." 

- L. Tom Perry

Burning Bright On the Darkest Night
The first new tradition our family participated in is all about "light growing brighter."  It happens every 21st of December, the darkest night of the year, the Winter Solstice.  My friend Alicia and her husband Stan invited us to join them in their annual tradition of making candles out of real bee's wax.  Stan's father, and grandfather were bee keepers and he and Alicia are the ones today who keep the family honey making business buzzing. :P  Alicia is one of the amazing and talented ladies in our home school co-op group.  It's so fun to have her share with us her wealth of knowledge of how the bees make the wax and the process they go through to extract it.   I reminded Chandler that his name means, candle maker or light bearer.  He rolled his eyes at me, "I know mom.  How many times do you have to tell me that?" I smiled and ignored his grumpy attitude, glad he at least made the decision to come along with us that evening.   It really was a great Family Night and we look forward to doing it again a second time next year.

Every 23rd of December

The next tradition is every 23rd of December we gather with all of my husband's siblings and parents at his sister's house in Alpine.  We feast on delicious food and take turns doing a family talent show or skit on the stage in their basement. Anyone who is out of state watches the show through Skype. It ranges from piano or violin playing, reader's theater, reciting poetry, family trivia, or singing Christmas carols.  The main rule is to have a great time.  After all the performances we go back upstairs and treat ourselves to my father-in-law's traditional sweet rolls,"Bert's Buns." 

Then here's my favorite part; we all get a copy of the famous Rawlin's Photobook.  Me and Joseph's seven sisters rotate through designing and coordinating the photographs of everyone in the family from the past year.  It's hard to keep track of a growing family of nine children but that's why we use the wonderful tool of the internet.  No matter where anyone is living in the world, they access our family photo book for the year and upload pictures on to their assigned pages. It results in a book that includes everyone, captures priceless memories, shares our stories, and inspires greater love and unity.  We've stopped doing gift exchanges even with the grandchildren.  This is hands down everyone's favorite gift from the oldest in the family to the youngest.  After we open the latest Rawlin's Photo Book edition, everyone spends over an hour reading, laughing, reminiscing, and enjoying it together.

Christmas Eve

Our own little family Christmas Eve tradition has gotten more fun since we decided to try my friend Suzanne's idea of a Shepherd's Dinner.  We give the kids their own special candle and eat on the floor by the light of our Christmas tree.  The food is simple: grapes, pomegranate, fresh vegetables w/ hummus, pieces of cheese, a fresh loaf of uncut bread, and some kind of meat or fish.  (stuff a shepherd would eat)

The kids get a little restless after dinner so before we continue with the old-world theme, we watch my favorite Christmas movie, "It's a Wonderful Life."  Then we do our reading of Luke 2.  (We've given the kids the option to dress up as the characters but every year they would rather use our Bethlehem Nativity pieces and act out the scriptures with them.)

After the Nativity, we unwrap our new Christmas Book, a tradition we started in 2011 or 2012.  This year our book was "The Tale of Three Trees" by, Angela Elwell Hunt.

Then we send the kids off to bed.  They like to sleep in the same room together and stay up all night watching more movies.... usually, The Grinch and Elf.  It's the only time of year where I'll let them watch as many movies in a row as they want.

Christmas Morning
Before we open any presents, we have a family prayer of gratitude. We read "The Living Christ" and share briefly what we want to give our Savior the new year.  For breakfast, we always invite a neighbor who lives alone to share our traditional strawberry, cream cheese, french toast. We hope that by doing this our children will learn to reach out to others on Christmas day, to think outside of themselves and see that the most meaningful thing is not the gifts but being in the presence of people who love you.  This year it was my dear friend, Lou.

Well, there you have it.  Traditions old and new.  They give us purpose, meaning, and direction.  And in the words of Tevye, “Because of our traditions, everyone knows who he is and what God expects him to do.”

-Alicia

Christ-in-us = Christmas

I've never been one who enjoys shopping, especially Christmas shopping.  I'm grateful for the internet because it cuts down the hassle immensely.... no crowds, no lines, and the whole "grabby" consumer atmosphere.   Now, I really do enjoy buying presents for other people but I prefer giving gifts that have meaning, that spark happy memories. I struggle when it feels like all I'm giving is just more "things."

"Come, my brethren, every one that thirsteth, come ye to the waters; and he that hath no money, come buy and eat; yea, come buy wine and milk without money and without price.  Wherefore, do not spend money for that which is of no worth, nor your labor for that which cannot satisfy." - 2 Nephi 9:50, 51

This isn't an official Christmas song but as I listen to it, I think of this little math equation (Chirst-in-us = Christmas).  It's so very true.  I treasure deep connection with friends and family.  This is what truly makes me happy and it just can't ever be bought from a store or stuffed under a tree.  It only happens when we all take our personal journey's to become one with Christ and in doing so we connect deeper with each other.

Earlier this week I found this quote from President James E. Faust that I think fits perfectly with the equation I've been pondering:

"We all enjoy giving and receiving presents. But there is a difference between presents and gifts. The true gifts may be part of ourselves—giving of the riches of the heart and mind—and therefore more enduring and of far greater worth than presents bought at the store.

Of course, among the greatest of gifts is the gift of love.... He whose birth we celebrate has told us that all of the law and the prophets is contained in loving God and our fellowmen. James called this 'the royal law' (James 2:8). The Apostle Paul said, 'To know the love of Christ … passeth knowledge' (Eph. 3:19). In the First Epistle of John we are told, 'Beloved, let us love one another: for love is of God; and every one that loveth is born of God, and knoweth God' (1 Jn. 4:7).

....The message of this season that is applicable throughout the year lies not in the receiving of earthly presents and treasures but in the forsaking of selfishness and greed and in going forward, seeking and enjoying the gifts of the Spirit, which Paul said are 'love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith, meekness, temperance: against such there is no law' (Gal. 5:22–23)." - President James E. Faust - Dec. 2001

Happy Holidays my friends!  "Let us love one another: for love is of God" This is Christ in us... this is Christmas.
-Alicia

The Purest Love

"The gospel of Jesus Christ is a gospel of transformation. It takes us as men and women of the earth and refines us into men and women for the eternities." - Joseph B. Wirthlin

I loved President Monson's opening message in this recent General Conference of how we "Let our light shine." It broke my heart to see him so physically weak, laboring in breath, and barely able to stand near the end of his testimony. But he was determined to deliver the sermon the Lord had inspired him to share - This made it even more powerful to me! I wanted to jump through the screen, quickly run to his side and hold him up. Oh how I love our dear prophet! And what a more perfect benadictary talk than that given by Elder Bednar as he testified of the wisdom and clarity that rests upon the First Presidency and the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles. Tears of deep gratitude streamed down my face as Elder Bednar highlighted teachings from these wonderful men I love!!! The Church is true, we are led by Apostles and Prophets who have been called of God by priesthood authority. I know this! What a blessing it has been to me throughout my life!

Many of my friends mentioned having the same feelings I did as the Prophet spoke, the feeling of wanting to run to President Monson and help hold him up.  This sheds greater light on what it means to sustain those who lead and direct this Church.

I also enjoyed what Elder Holland said about "bearing one another's burdens" and how both he and Elder Renlund tied the pure love of Christ and the love of a mother so intimately .  It seems so obvious but I had never put the two together.  It makes sense.  

"Today I declare from this pulpit what has been said here before: that no love in mortality comes closer to approximating the pure love of Jesus Christ than the selfless love a devoted mother has for her child." - Elder Jeffrey R. Holland

"In the Church, to effectively serve others we must see them through a parent’s eyes, through Heavenly Father’s eyes. Only then can we begin to comprehend the true worth of a soul. Only then can we sense the love that Heavenly Father has for all of His children. Only then can we sense the Savior’s caring concern for them. We cannot completely fulfill our covenant obligation to mourn with those who mourn and comfort those who stand in need of comfort unless we see them through God’s eyes."- Elder Dale G. Renlund

"Bear, borne, carry, deliver. These are powerful, heartening messianic words. They convey help and hope for safe movement from where we are to where we need to be—but cannot get without assistance. These words also connote burden, struggle, and fatigue—words most appropriate in describing the mission of Him who, at unspeakable cost, lifts us up when we have fallen, carries us forward when strength is gone, delivers us safely home when safety seems far beyond our reach. ...

...As Jesus said to John while in the very act of Atonement, so He says to us all, “Behold thy mother!”- Elder Jeffrey R. Holland

I remember when Elder Wirthlin was trembling and weak. President Russell M. Nelson stood behind him to steady him. This touched my heart so deeply. This is what the Gospel is truly about, the purest love that deepens our desire to help carry and sustain our brother or sister.

He Ain't Heavy He's My Brother

"True love lasts forever. It is eternally patient and forgiving. It believes, hopes, and endures all things. That is the love our Heavenly Father bears for us...

... His love is such that even should we give up on ourselves, He never will.

We see ourselves in terms of yesterday and today. Our Heavenly Father sees us in terms of forever. Although we might settle for less, Heavenly Father won’t, for He sees us as the glorious beings we are capable of becoming.

The gospel of Jesus Christ is a gospel of transformation. It takes us as men and women of the earth and refines us into men and women for the eternities.

The means of this refinement is our Christlike love. There is no pain it cannot soften, no bitterness it cannot remove, no hatred it cannot alter. The Greek playwright Sophocles wrote: 'One word frees us of all the weight and pain of life: That word is love.'" - Joseph B. Wirthlin

- Alicia

The Sunshine of Life

There are just some people you trust completely, whose hearts are pure and whose lives manifest stunning grandeur.  I'm grateful for such friends to grace my days and wish there was a way I could more adequately express how much they mean to me.  I am forever thankful for their examples of self-less service and tireless efforts to be noble in word and deed.  They inspire me to be better than I am and I value them more than gold.  What a treasure!

David O. McKay said it best,

"Among life's sweetest blessings is fellowship 

with men and women whose ideals and aspirations are high and noble.  

Next to a sense of kinship with God 

comes the helpfulness, encouragement, and inspiration of friends. 

 Friendship is a sacred possession.  

As air, water, and sunshine is to flowers, trees, and verdure, 

so smiles, sympathy, and love of friends is to the daily life of man. 

'To live, laugh, love one's friends and be loved by them is to bask in the sunshine of life.'  

One of the principal reasons which the Lord had for establishing His Church 

is to give all persons high and low, rich and poor strong and feeble 

an opportunity to associate with their fellow men 

in an atmosphere of uplifting, religious fellowship.  

This may be found in priesthood quorums, auxiliaries, sacrament meetings.  

He who neglects these opportunities, who fails to take advantage of them, 

to that extent starves his own soul." 

- David O. McKay, Conf. Report, April 1940 p. 116. 

Amen, President McKay!
-Alicia

Using Words

"Preach the Gospel at all times, and if necessary use words." 

A sister shared this quote in Sacrament Meeting today.  I've heard it many times before and It always strikes me deep.  I often worry that I'm one of those who talks too much.  I certainly feel like I have plenty of room for improvement in the "practice what I preach" arena.  Admittedly, whenever I hear this quote, I feel to step back, examine myself more fully, and think, "Man, I really need to train myself to shut my mouth."

However, I don't think this quote means that words aren't necessary.  Take a look at 2 Nephi 25:26, where the Prophet Nephi says we are to talk, rejoice, preach, prophesy, and write of Christ.  All of these connote the use of words.

Elder Holland also expounds upon the importance of words: "In his deeply moving final testimony, Nephi calls us to “follow the Son [of God], with full purpose of heart,” promising that “after ye have … received the baptism of fire and of the Holy Ghost, [ye] can speak with a new tongue, yea, even with the tongue of angels. … And … how could ye speak with the tongue of angels save it were by the Holy Ghost? Angels speak by the power of the Holy Ghost; wherefore, they speak the words of Christ.”  Indeed, Christ was and is “the Word,” according to John the Beloved,  full of grace and truth, full of mercy and compassion." - Elder Jeffrey R. Holland (The Tongue of Angels) (2 Nephi 31:13–14; 32:2–3) 

Clearly we see the necessity of words -  it is through their power that heaven and earth are bound together, through words that we commune with God, call down angels, and connect with each other.  But just as we are merely dust without our Father in Heaven, our words are also useless and hollow if our hearts are not sincere.

Paul taught, "Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, and have not charity, I am become as sounding brass, or a tinkling cymbal.  And though I have the gift of prophecy, and understand all mysteries, and all knowledge; and though I have all faith, so that I could remove mountains, and have not charity, I am nothing." 1 Corinthians 13:1,2

It is only when love, pure Christ-like love, is our moving and motivating force that our words have any power.  And what is Christ-like love?  It is certainly more than lip service. Jesus said, "If you love me, keep my commandments."

"Spiritually mature obedience is 'the Savior’s obedience.' It is motivated by true love for Heavenly Father and His Son. When we willingly obey, as our Savior did, we cherish the words of our Heavenly Father." - Elder Robert D. Hales - April 2014

The Savior's obedience is motivated by true love for our Father - which ultimately means His love was displayed by sacrifice.

When we sincerely love, honor, and cherish God's word, we will feel the necessity to preach the Gospel at all times, we willingly sacrifice... and what we say will be every bit a part of what we do.

I pray that the Lord will strengthen me to be a better witness of Him.

-Alicia

The Proof of Your Love

(For King and Country)

If I sing but don't have love

I waste my breath with every song

I bring an empty voice, a hollow noise

If I speak with a silver tongue

Convince a crowd but don't have love

I leave a bitter taste with every word I say

So let my life be the proof,

The proof of your love

Let my love look like You and what You're made of

How You lived, how You died

Love is sacrifice

So let my life be the proof,

The proof of Your love

If I give

To a needy soul but don't have love then who is poor?

It seems all the poverty is found in me

So let my life be the proof,

The proof of Your love

Let my love look like You and what You're made of

How You lived, how You died

Love is sacrifice

Oh, let my life be the proof,

The proof of Your love

When it's all said and done

When we sing our final song

Only love remains

Only love remains

Let my life be the proof,

The proof of Your love

Let my love look like You and what You're made of

How You lived, how You died

Love is sacrifice

So let my life be the proof,

The proof of Your love